Read more posts by Nick Catucci

Filed Under: 30 rock, overnights, tv

Judah Friedlander Was Fired From a Job Handing Out Flyers

At last night’s after-party for the screening of Jason Reitman’s new film Up in the Air, 30 Rock star Judah Friedlander said he related to one of the movie’s themes — getting laid off. Years ago, the comedian and actor said he had a gig handing out flyers for a podiatrist on the streets of New York. He'd work on one street corner, and his manager would work across the street. "So one day, the manager goes to me, 'Fuck it, man, let's just go to McDonald's." "I'm like okay, he's the boss, so we go to McDonald's for like two hours. And we start doing that a while," Friedlander explained to us. “And then one day he calls me up, and he’s like, ‘Judah you’re fired.’” When Friedlander asked why, he was told that it was because their employer had checked on them, and they weren't on their spots."I’m like ‘Yeah, because I was at McDonald’s with you!"’ he said, asking if his boss was also fired. "'They’ve decided to keep me on,’” the boss explained. Many, many jobs later, Friedlander went on to star in a hit network television show and laugh about the whole thing.

Read more posts by Angela Gaimari

Filed Under: jobs, judah friendlander, party lines

Paris Hilton Photos Seized During Las Vegas Raid

A 19-year-old Las Vegas woman has been identified as the leader of a burglary ring suspected of a series of break-ins at celebrities' homes.

Hideki: Suki Is Waiting for You [Publicity Stunts]

World Series MVP Hideki Matsui celebrated the Yankees win at today's tickertape parade. And while we have no idea if plans to keep the party going this evening, he probably should know that no less than 100 lovely ladies are going to be waiting for him on West 33rd Street tonight, including "Suki" (right) who happens to be fluent in Japanese.  Oh, and Hideki's wife is invited, too, naturally.

Matsui, who, it should be noted, is a longstanding fan of all things XXX and has a famously large porn collection, is cordially invited to be the guest of honor at the strip club Rick's Cabaret this evening. Per the press release:

Yankee Hideki Matsui, MVP of the World Series, has a big fan club at Rick's Cabaret.  Several of the club's sexiest sirens speak Japanese and want to "show and tell" their hero exactly how they feel about him. "We want to give him his own personal Victory Parade at Rick's -- 100 girls toasting him with champagne!" declared Suki, 34D-23-32. "We know he's married and we hope he'll bring his wife!  Everyone wants to dance for the woman that won his big heart," added 23 year-old Swedish beauty Elke, 36DD-27-35.

Oscar Futures: Precious Arrives — With a Backlash?

Every week between now and February 2, when the nominations are announced, movies and stars will help themselves — or, sometimes, hurt themselves — in the Oscar race. Vulture's Oscar Futures will listen to insider gossip, comb the blogs, and out-and-out guess when necessary to track who's up, who's down, and who's currently leading the race for a coveted nomination.

Best Picture	UP: Precious. You've been hearing about it since January and it's finally here! Mostly great reviews affirm its strong hand this season. But ...	DOWN: Precious. ... are these first sounds of the long-anticipated backlash? New York's David Edelstein didn't love it and Armond White's over-the-top pan got more attention than the raves (and some even agree with him, a little).
	CURRENT PREDIX: Bright Star, An Education, The Hurt Locker, Invictus, Nine, Precious: Based on the Novel Push by Sapphire, A Serious Man, A Single Man, Up, Up in the Air

Best Director	UP: Jason Reitman Up in the Air. The Oscar-prognosticating Gurus of Gold returned this week and have his Air in the lead for Best Pic.	DOWN: Peter Jackson, The Lovely Bones. Is he suited for the material? asks the Times: "[Alice Sebold's] book is soothing and rather solemn — two words that rarely have been applied to Peter Jackson."
	CURRENT PREDIX: Kathryn Bigelow, The Hurt Locker; Lee Daniels, Precious: Based on the Novel Push by Sapphire; Clint Eastwood, Invictus; Rob Marshall, Nine; Jason Reitman, Up in the Air.
Best Actor	UP: Jeff Bridges, Crazy Heart. Fox Searchlight screened Heart (being described as a country-music Wrestler) for LA-based bloggers this week who all seem to think he could be a front runner.	DOWN: George Clooney, Up in the Air. Movieline notes that his role is essentially the same as Bridges' — and Bridges has never won.
	CURRENT PREDIX: Jeff Bridges, Crazy Heart; George Clooney, Up in the Air; Colin Firth, A Single Man; Morgan Freeman, Invictus.
Best Actress	UP: Gabourey Sidibe, Precious. Critics who loved the movie are just as effusive about her performance: "Heartbreaking!" "The glue that holds it together!" "An astounding debut!" She's a lock for a nomination, at least.	DOWN: Marion Cotillard, Nine. Will she really compete in lead? She's great, say those who've seen it, but her role doesn't sound as big or flashy as Penélope Cruz's.
	CURRENT PREDIX: Abbie Cornish, Bright Star; Helen Mirren, The Last Station; Carey Mulligan, An Education; Gabourey Sidibe, Precious: Based on the Novel Push by Sapphire; Meryl Streep, Julie & Julia.
Best Supporting Actor	UP: Kodi Smit-Mcphee, The Road. There's not much movement in the category this week, but his movie's new and improved trailer, plus some appreciation from the Times, certainly doesn't hurt him.	DOWN: Lenny Kravitz, Precious. Practically the only actor in the film without any awards buzz or notable shout-outs from critics.
	CURRENT PREDIX: Matt Damon, Invictus; Alfred Molina, An Education; Christopher Plummer, The Last Station; Stanley Tucci The Lovely Bones; Christoph Waltz, Inglourious Basterds.
Best Supporting Actress	UP: Mo'Nique, Precious. Critics are predictably impressed: "She burns a hole in the screen!" "If Oscar has a sure thing this year, Mo'Nique is it." Plus she's actually promoting the film now.	DOWN: Judi Dench, Nine. Not much buzz from this week's test screenings. If anyone from Nine beats Mo'Nique, it'll probably be Cruz.
	CURRENT PREDIX: Penélope Cruz, Nine; Judi Dench, Nine; Anna Kendrick, Up in the Air; Mo'nique, Precious: Based on the Novel Push by Sapphire; Julianne Moore, A Single Man.

Related: View the Party Lines slideshow from the Precious premiere.

Read more posts by Lane Brown

Filed Under: kudos, movies, oscar futures, oscars

Top 5 Parodies of Lady Gaga's 'Poker Face'

Kim’s “Don’t Be Tardy For The Party” Live Surpasses Our Every Wish

Last night, we got our last little nugget of joy charity from this season of The Real Housewives of Atlanta, as part 2 of the Reunion aired on Bravo. The hour offered many a chuckle, mainly stemming from Dwight and his Angry Inches (penile implants… tre tre tre declasse).

But host/Bravo Exec Andy Cohen isn’t stupid. Because anyone with half a brain would realize what America really wants: Kim Zolciak sing her hit song “Don’t Be Tardy For The Party.” Spoiler alert: It’s the best f**king thing you will ever see and/or hear. When the aliens come for us, show them this. They will flee our planet within a handful of nanomoklars (interplanetary seconds).

We’re surprised her wig didn’t flee the scene. But kudos to Kim for having the balls to get up there and do it! You know she knows she ain’t good.

The Reading Habits of Wall Street CEOs

Unsurprisingly, they prefer to read about great men: In Duff McDonald's Last Man Standing, JPMorgan CEO Jamie Dimon claims to have read biographies of Caesar, Alexander, Napoleon, Nelson Mandela, and ten U.S. presidents, including George Washington, Abraham Lincoln, and Ulysses S. Grant. Meanwhile, Andrew Ross Sorkin's Too Big to Fail contains a scene in which Goldman Sachs's Lloyd Blankfein is reading David Fromkin's A Peace to End All Peace: The Fall of the Ottoman Empire and the Creation of the Modern Middle East, in which Winston Churchill is a central character. [Das Krapital]

Read more posts by Jessica Pressler

Filed Under: business, jamie dimon, lloyd blankfein, wall street, white men who are literary as well as handsome

Exclusive Tinseltown Tidbits: Kanye West Releases Picture-Book

Is West's illustrated book -- complete with childlike depictions of the rapper -- enough to bring him back into fans' good graces?

Fort Hood Shooter Emptied His Apartment Before Massacre

Major Nidal Malik Hasan emptied his apartment before going on the shooting spree that left 13 people dead and 31 wounded yesterday. The Army psychiatrist was scheduled to deploy to Afghanistan to offer therapy to soldiers there, so his neighbors — who say they didn't know him — were not suspicious when he began passing around his personal belongings to them. According to the Post, he visited one woman's apartment and gave her a new Quran, plus some frozen broccoli, spinach, portable shelves, and T-shirts. A day later, he gave her his air mattress, a desk lamp, and several briefcases. He then, according to reports, "offered her $60 to clean his apartment Friday morning, after he was supposed to leave."

Fort Hood shooter emptied apartment in days before attack [NYP]

Read more posts by Chris Rovzar

Filed Under: crime, fort hood, nidal malik hasan, shootings

Katy Perry’s Disco-Ball Manicure; Olsens’ Makeup Line Discontinued

NAILS
• Katy Perry tweeted a picture of her manicure, and her nails are covered in diamond rhinestones. It looks like each little finger is its own disco ball! We want. [Twitter/KatyPerry via BellaSugar]

MAKEUP
• Mary-Kate and Ashley Olsen's beauty line mary-kateandashley is discontinued. It had sold in Wal-Mart since 2002. The Olsens are considering doing beauty again under their Olsenboye label for JCPenney. [WWD]

• Estée Lauder signed super makeup artist Tom Pecheux as its new creative makeup director. His first set of products will debut for spring 2010, and his first campaign will star Hilary Rhoda. [SassyBella]

• An early preview of Forever 21's Love & Beauty makeup line shows glittery glosses, glittery eye shadow, and glittery powder. Forever 21 — the new sparkle factory. [Examiner]

HAIR
• New York Yankee Hideki Matsui slicks his hair back with L.A. Looks gel to avoid getting hat hair. And when he whipped off his cap after winning the World Series on Wednesday, it worked — his hair was silky, smooth, and sweatless. Matsui is a Hair MVP. [Daily Beauty Reporter/Allure]

FRAGRANCE
• Barbara Orbison launched a perfume named Pretty Woman, named after her husband Roy Orbison's famous hit song. [WWD]

Read more posts by Sharon Clott

Filed Under: ashley olsen, barbara orbison, beauty, beauty marks, estee lauder, fragrance, hideki matsui, hilary rhoda, katy perry, makeup, mary-kate olsen, nails, olsenboye, roy orbison, tom pecheux

BEST DAY EVER: Unlike Whoopi, Doug Benson Always Gets His Gay Wizards Straight

Mariah Carey needs some work playing coy with Larry King, and Whoopi needs to study up on wizards if she ever wants Sir Ian McKellen back on The View. Thankfully Doug Benson was on his game in this episode of Best Day Ever:

Catch another new episode of Best Day Ever tonight at 11pm on VH1.

Jemaine Clement on Why Flight of the Conchords Might End, and What Might Be Next

Earlier this week, Jemaine Clement broke the news that his folk-comedy duo, Flight of the Conchords, “very likely might not” return as a series. He and his elfin collaborator, Bret McKenzie, will make their final decision within the next month. What’s at stake? Family commitments, as it turns out. “Bret and I are both fathers,” Clement told us during an interview to promote his (troubled) new film Gentlemen Broncos. “We know if we take on another season, that means we’re not gonna see our family for a year.” Even if he dragged his wife and 1-year-old son, Sophocles (Soph, for short), from New Zealand to New York, where the show is shot, he says he’d still be working every single day.

If Clement does retire, hopefully we’ll see more of him on the big screen. (He is, after all, the best part of the flailing Jared Hess film.) “Films actually don't take a lot of time, but TV shows are so fast-paced. Even though they're both acting, they're almost totally different jobs,” he says. “People think actors wanna move to film because it’s high profile, and I don’t think that’s the reason. I think it’s simply that they have more free time.”

Read more posts by Mina Hochberg

Filed Under: flight of the conchords, music, news reel, tv

If It Walks Like a Gossip Girl and Talks Like a Gossip Girl...

Our beloved characters really grew up on this week's Gossip Girl and, as usual, you had a lot to say about it. Everyone appreciated the classic Beverly Hills, 90210 reference, though we have a hard time believing Blair would sit at home watching SoapNet to learn that line. You were all delighted when the writers finally admitted that Serena can sometimes be mistaken for a call girl, and praised them for finding a way to get Little J to take off the raccoon makeup. Of course, the question remains — when will Blair be back on top (double entendre intended)? And where's Wallace Shawn when you need him?

Realer Than Serena Being Mistaken for a Prostitute by a Genuine Call Girl
• Why is it that the only thing that I've ever seen Serena read are articles with pictures of herself? Plus 50.
 —MISERABLE

• Olivia's wearing plaid, playing Scrabble, and celebrating her one month anniversary with dinner on the floor. Plus 5 for settling into the Humphrey Lifestyle so well! —FASHIONRAT

• "I thought I was working this party alone, did the agency send you over?" Common mistake, Plus 5.
 —SOUTHERNCOMFORT

• Oh and the reason why Jenny is sick is because homegirl hasn't eaten in two seasons. Plus 5. —POLISHPIEROGI

• Plus 20 for the homoerotic tension between Blair and Brandeis when they first meet. This harkens back to Blair's summary of the NYU experience as consisting of "rereading Beloved and experimenting with lesbianism." —SNARKETTE

• Plus 5 for Lily's obvious exhaustion after playing 5 hours of scrabble with Rufus & co. She doesn't spend that much time with her own kids, let alone someone else's.
 —SPARKLE17

• Serena is going to be a congressman's mistress, then wife. Plus 1500. Grandma CeCe will be so proud, and Lily will be so jealous. —CACTUSFLOWERY

• Plus 1 Dan is totally one of those douches who rushes off to find the Scrabble Dictionary just to prove he really is that smart. I know, because I too am one of those douches. —JESSICHUCKA

• When S pushes B into the cake, B plants with her face only, managing to save all but a few strands of hair from becoming a sticky, icing mess. Plus 4. I'm pretty sure strategic cake falling is the sort of thing the young elite have to master before cotillion. —SHARPIEPEN

• Of course Chuck knew Blair's friend was a callgirl. He has a radar for these things, the same way Blair has a radar for expensive waitlisted bags. (I hear you can buy radar at Sharper Image.) Plus 10. —LUCYV

• Plus 2 -- Jenny is so trendy to have H1N1 while its all the rage. —MISSELISA

• After hearing about the debacle with Eric and Jonathan last episode, Lily finally did some parenting and banned Jenny from wearing that demon-powered eyeliner for a week, leaving her as weak as a kitten with it's paw out. Plus 5. —THE_DEACON

• If it walks like a duck..." is one of the best lines from the original teen drama- Beverly Hills 90210. Plus 10 because of course Blair is closet 90210 fan, and has been waiting for a chance to use the line to accuse Serena of the same thing Brenda accused Kelly of: blonde sluttyness. —CONSUELAKITKAT

• Plus 6 for the fact that Rufus, Lily, Jenny, Erik, Dan, and Olivia were absent from the party. I was just waiting to see how the writers would make sure they were all there, but for once, I was pleasantly surprised. —ALIOOP

Faker Than Serena Telling Anyone to Put Some Clothes on While Keeping a Straight Face
• Minus 10 for Vanessa's ridiculous 'dream catcher' followed by 'elephant tusk' gold hoop earrings. I was actually worried they might fall into the river and strangle a passing dolphin. —DOCLUVSBASS

• After winning an election amongst scandal, why would Trip's first move be to drink martinis with an 18 year old in a bar that as of three days ago didn't have a liquor license? Minus 3.
 —BACKWARDS_WALK

• Why does Serena keep talking like she just had her wisdom teeth removed? STOP IT. Minus 5.
 —JWANG9

• If they wanted us to buy that plotline about Blair befriending an escort, maybe they shouldn’t have made her look like the manicurist in Legally Blonde. Minus 5. —PETITEESTHETE

• Oh, and Serena voted? No, not even. There are far too many buttons involved. Although, there are stickers...so even. 

—IM_CHUCK_BASS

• Isn't anyone in a high-brow, political inner circle of an incredibly established, blue-blood family worried about the grungy, Brooklyn street kid following everyone around with a camcorder? Minus 20
. —KDOW3

• Dan turned his shirt inside-out to hide his sweat stains? Is that one of the little-known, magical powers of plaid? —DOLLYWOULD

• Van Der Bilt? Sounds like something from EuroTrip. It's Vanderbilt. Check the mansion. Minus 1. —JUSTCALLMEBLAIR

• Serena was "just discussing the Senate Committee on Appropriations." NO. Minus 3. —BRIDGEANDTUNNEL

• I also forget to give Olivia a minus 5 for her bedroom sheets. They are the awful kind of matchy-matchy sheets sold in a bag in Wal-Mart during the "Back to School" specials. Which would normally be a plus 5 for reality (I had something equally heinous) BUT no self-respecting Hollywood starlet would choose Wal-mart poly-blend over Egyptian cotton, no matter how "real" she was trying to be. —COUNTRYMAEVE [Ed: To be fair, the sheets are sold at PB Teen]

• Minus 100 for Vanessa still trying to be all self righteous. She schemes, she plots, she blackmails, she sells out her friends and she humps anyone that will give her the time of day. Enough. —STILETTO33

• Isn't this one month anniversary thing kind of out of control? It's ONE MONTH people, and she was out of town for half of it. Minus 2. —TROCK

• Minus 15 for the unexplained absence of Dorata this entire episode, she would have clearly been there wiping the frosting off Mees Blair's face and re-applying her Dior Mascara to her lashes. —MSCHUCKBASS

• Show, when are you going to have Anderson Cooper make an appearance??? A family political event would have been the PERFECT venue for him to finally show up. Minus 100. Unless he shows up in next week's 3-way ep, in which case plus 1 million. —FROCKY

Read more posts by CBGIRL and Alexandra Martell

Filed Under: gossip girl, The Greatest Show of Our Time, the recap of the recap

Crocs Are Profitable Again

Crocs announced third-quarter profits of $22.1 million yesterday, which is much better than their year-earlier loss of $148 million. So BOO, because despite all our hopes that these ugly, colored rubber "shoes" would vanish from the planet — or at least the American market — they are doing all right. The company has been working to cut costs and reduce inventory. CEO John Duerden doesn't expect profits in the fourth quarter, possibly because the shoes have holes in them, something people won't buy in the winter. Retail sales increased 40 percent, but in America sales slid 2.8 percent. Some have asked whether Michelle Obama has the power to save retail just by wearing clothes. Well, she doesn't seem to have the power to save Crocs. But if Crocs didn't give up on themselves, we won't give up on our hopes and dreams, either.

Crocs Shares Slide As 4Q Guidance Disappoints Investors [WSJ]

Read more posts by Amy Odell

Filed Under: crocs, john duerden, ugly things

'Sesame Street' Ombudsman Says Fox News Parody 'Should Have Been Resisted'

Children's show takes heat during its big 40th anniversary celebration.

Islamic Lawmakers Attempt to Ban Beyoncé’s ‘Nudity Party’

Though last week it was reported that Beyoncé's Malaysian concert would be postponed, USA Today reports it has been canceled entirely. And now Islamic conservatives in Egypt, where she's scheduled to perform tonight, are waging a fierce campaign against her, labeling her show an "insolent sex party" and "nudity party." Beyoncé plans to shake her stuff for her fans there anyway, with extra security. Tourism and police officials believe the concert is a way to "promote Egypt as a center of culture, entertainment and art." [USAT]

Read more posts by Amy Odell

Filed Under: beyonce, divas, i'm a i'm a a diva

The Hygienic Terrorist [Street Vendors]

Remember Najibullah Zazi, the coffee cart vendor from Queens who was arrested in September for conspiring to bomb targets using homemade chemical weapons? As dangerous as he may have been with explosives in his possession, it turns out he wasn't much of a threat when it came to coffee and donuts. City inspection records indicate he only received six tickets between December 2004 and May 2008, "a tally that industry representatives say is impressively low." We knew there had to be a silver lining somewhere! [NYT]

Former Citigroup Co-Chairman Apologizes for Creating a Monster

Citigroup's former chairman John Reed, who along with Sandy Weill helped build Citigroup into a giant fat dangerous waddling monster that is now a ward of the state, has apologized. “I’m sorry,” Reed, 70, told Bloomberg. You should know he's hurting, too: “You could imagine emotionally it’s not easy to see what’s happened.” Well. At least with the $23.4 million he took home between 1997 and 1999, he can afford therapy. [Bloomberg]

Read more posts by Jessica Pressler

Filed Under: business, citigroup, john reed, sandy weill, still waiting to hear from sandy on this matter, white men who can stuff their sorries in a sack, white men with money

A Few People in Congress Aren’t Millionaires

Ever wonder why Congress so often feels so out of touch with regular Americans? It's because they're not regular Americans! A study by the Center for Responsive Politics finds that out of the 535 members of the Senate and House of Representatives, 237 of them are millionaires. That means millionaires make up 44 percent of the members of Congress, compared to just 1 percent of all Americans. That's a lot more millionaires!

Part of the discrepancy can be chalked up to the inherent advantages that rich candidates have getting elected in the first place — they have money to spend on campaigns, and powerful friends with influence and money as well. But we're also reminded of a study a few years ago that found that senators, on average, outperform the stock market by 12 percent annually, a remarkable number considering that "a mutual-fund manager who beats the market by two or three per cent a year is considered a genius," according to The New Yorker. It's not because they're smarter; they just put their inside information to good use. Anyway, one man you can assume wasn't inside trading — or was doing it very ineptly — is former senator Joe Biden, who has a net worth of $27,000, God love him.

Report: 237 millionaires in Congress [Politico]

Read more posts by Dan Amira

Filed Under: oh congress!, politics

Anna Goes Pizza-Less [Office Parties]

Staffers at Vogue did not celebrate Anna Wintour's 60th birthday earlier this week. According to Voguette Lauren Santo Domingo, Anna was in Washington getting "knighted" by President Obama. (She was actually appointed to the White House Committee on the Arts and Humanities along with 24 other media people, but why quibble?) Which is too bad since—shockingly—she says staff birthdays at Vogue are typically celebrated with "pizza parties and cupcake parties." [The Cut]

Phillip Crangi’s New Store Bejewels and Bedazzles

On lower Ninth Avenue, just north of Pastis, is a tiny new jewel box of a store that could be easily overlooked. Beloved jewelry designer Phillip Crangi just opened his first retail store last week after months of gutting and fully renovating the narrow space. With green velvet walls, black pressed-tin ceilings, and a slightly disheveled antique chandelier, the warm and cozy store is jam-packed with his beautiful, unique creations. The shop, called the Crangi Family Project, carries the designer's two lines (Phillip Crangi and Giles & Brother), along with carefully selected vintage items, like stacks of worn books on a variety of topics. We visited the store to check out some of the offerings.

The Crangi Family Project, 9 Ninth Ave., nr. Little West 12th St.; 212-929-0858

Read more posts by Doria Santlofer

Filed Under: buyer's guide, jewelry, phillip crangi, slideshow, the crangi family project

'Precious' Will Leave Lasting Mark

Review: Arsenault's latest novel a fast-paced romp (AP)

AP - "Loot the Moon" (Minotaur), 276 pages, $24.99, by Mark Arsenault: Billy Povich, former investigative reporter, has been reassigned to write obituaries — his newspaper's way of encouraging him to quit.

Britney show angers fans

Start The Bubblebath… It’s Saxophone Day

Yes, there is an official holiday called Saxophone Day, in celebration of the classical instrument invented all the way back in 1840. (Hol’ up: Did they have slow jamz back then? Yes.) So, to celebrate this instrument that was the cause for many a lovemaking session back in the late 80s/early 90s, we bring your our two favorite not to mention most obvious saxophone related clips.

First up, a classic: Bill Clinton blowing the horn on The Arsenio Hall Show nearly 20 years ago. There’s a reason why LL Cool B, and it’s this. This is why he was elected President of both the United States and America’s Communal Vadg.

Bet you thought it was going to be Planet of Yakety Sax. Wrong.

Our second favorite saxophone related clip… ahead. Hint: It’s only 14 seconds long…

Saxomaphone. Saxomaphone.

Feel free to tell us about any children you’ve conceived while listening to this revered instrument in the comments.

A new Leon Trotsky exhibit is opening in Saint Peterssburg

PHOTOS: Sharon Osbourne's Harsh Description of Susan Boyle

Yankees + Suits = GQ MOTHERF*CKERS.

Here are your National Champion New York Yankees, all suited up for yesterday’s taping of Late Show with David Letterman. Only, they’ve ditched the pinstriped for sharkskin. And we know it’s trite and common to talk about how hot Derek Jeter is…

But camman. He is. To die for. And if you missed the actual interview (which we’ve posted ahead), your love for him will only grow deeper and more complicated, because he’s also funny. We had the pleasure of (name drop!) meeting him once, and even though his pants were belted a little too high, and his fade had sort of grown out, he was nothing short of the most charming, handsome man we have ever touched. It goes without saying we have still not washed our collective hands.

Ahead, photos of our other favorite Yankee, Andy Pettitte, along with Hideki Matsui, along with video footage of our beloved Yankees and Big Bird.

Here is pitcher Andy Pettitte dressed up like in his every day Halloween costume, “John Travolta in Grease.”

And a bonus shot of Hideki Matsui, who made a special appearance muted on the show because he still doesn’t really speak English. We’ll give him a pass on this one because he knows how to hit a ball with a stick, and he’s adorable:

We’re saddened to learn that our favorite Japanese baseball player might not return the team next season.

Here are highlights from the interview. Many a bonus point to Jeter for continuing to rib Letterman.

BONUS VID: The only person who has ever looked taller than Andy Pettitte in a talk show chair, Big Bird, on Jimmy Kimmel:

(click here for Part 2)

VIDEO: Dana Carvey Show’s “Skinheads From Maine” May Have Predicted The Future

The state of Maine voted this week to repeal legal same-sex marriage within the state.

I think we all know who’s behind this:

(via Buzzfeed)

GUESS WHO: Hot In High School? Shocked.

This one is wayyyy too easy. But if you had hoped that this guy was an ugly dork in high school, bad news: He was hotter. Answer after the jump, for those of you who just want to gaze upon a perfect creature in his current day glory.

It’s Jon Hamm. Yes, he was a hot jock in high school. Duh?

(And yes, it must be all ONTD day here.)

Related: Our favorite Jon Hamm post… 10 Suggest Hairstyles for the Man.

THE OFFICE: Michael’s Modest Future Flashes Before His Eyes

This week, the Michael / Pam’s Mom fling came to an abrupt halt with Michael’s realization that she’s 58 and about to become a grandmother, resulting in a characteristically awkward breakup on her birthday which he tries to play off as suddenly respecting Pam’s uneasiness with the situation. The meal itself was a little weird — did anyone else get the impression that Jim and Pam realized that Michael was having second thoughts and kept pushing him in that direction to break them up? How did they overlook how suddenly awkward he was being? — but when Michael finally calls off the relationship, Pam wants vengeance.

Pam ultimately takes up Michael on his throwaway offer “do you want to hit me” and, after some detailed punching lessons from Toby, meets Michael in the parking lot for one well-deserved, cathartic punch.

Here’s the big parking lot showdown, followed by the hilarious episode-concluding speech in which Michael describes the meticulously detailed life that flashes before his eyes:

Episode thoughts? Favorite parts/lines? Andy/Dwight sideplot nods? Predictions for the next multi-episode plotline? Leave ‘em in the comments.

Rihanna: Chris Brown Had 'No Soul in His Eyes' During Attack

Pop singer opens up about the night former boyfriend abused her in interview with Diane Sawyer.

Rihanna Exclusive: No Soul in Brown's Eyes

Rihanna gives details of assault

WATCH: 'Glee's' Amber Riley Has a 'Crazy Fan'

WATCH: Post-Game Gossip: Week's Biggest Buzz

Miley Cyrus Has “Never Heard a Jay-Z Song”

When I first found out that my adorable, young, innocent niece was a huge Miley Cyrus fan, I was horrified. No relative of mine was going to be a tone-deaf baby prostitute, and I let my brother know emphatically that I did not in any way support this phase.

Then, something really weird happened. Miley’s song “Party in the USA” was released. And the next thing I knew, I was cutting my clothes off on the dance floor every time it came on. Say what you will about Miley, but there’s no denying the almost stroke-inducing catchness of P.I.T.USA. — you can put your hands up to it, move your hips to it, nod to it, and sing along like a wild jungle animal to it.

At the Halloween party I attended, the genius DJ’s mixed the “And a Jay-Z song was on” line directly into “Empire State of Mind”, and the room went literally beserk. A vampire punched a clown in the face, two Care Bears started making out, and fun was had by all. For the first time ever, I accepted Miley Cyrus into my heart.

Then, she had to go ahead and say something.

The following interview with Miley — who is dressed up for Halloween as a slutty Native American, we think – she admits the WORST thing we have EVER heard: She has never heard a Jay-Z song. Not one. She even has the audacity to say (Ed. Note: We are editing out roughly 80 percent of the “likes” and “you knows”):

Miley: I picked that song cause I needed something to go with my clothing line, I didn’t write it. And it wasn’t something that, like, I even expected to be popular, originally. It was just something that I wanted to do, I needed some songs, and it turned out for the best.

Interviewer: You’ve gotta have one in mind. “Big Pimpin’”? “Can I Get A”?

Miley: I’ve never heard a Jay-Z Song. I don’t listen to pop music and I, like, it’s not even my style of music, that song. But I’m just really blessed for it to have done as well as it has.

Interviewer: #1.

Miley: Yeah, and I’m just totally, totally blessed. God has definitely put me in an amazing position with amazing people.

Which leads us to ask: Why Is Miley Cyrus Trying To Make Us Hate “Party in the USA”?

You can see and hear the interview for yourself ahead.

F*ck me, Notting Hill is one of her favorite movies? It’s one of my favorite movies! Commenters, please tell me how to feel on this issue.

The Latin Grammy: Just As Valuable As A Regular Grammy

Here’s Puerto Rican duo Calle 13 accepting roughly six billion statues at the Latin Grammy Awards yesterday; note that they’re carrying the statues like you’d carry a box of old college essays you found in the closet while moving apartments:

Inflation has now brought the Grammy Award to a record-low exchange rate of .61 Euro per Grammy (or roughly $510 U.S.)

On a scale of most valuable trophies, the Stanley Cup is right near the top, the Oscar right up there with it, followed by a piece of the Aggro Crag from GUTS, a white ribbon from a church bake sale, a Yahoo fantasy football title, a booby prize from a karaoke contest, a Science Olympiad patch, a chipped World’s Greatest Grandpa ceramic mug, and about twelve thousand trophies later, the Grammy.

Britney Spears’s Lip-Syncing Could Prompt New Legislation

Britney Spears keeps forgetting things! Forgetting to sing, forgetting her underwear...

Wanna Work with Will.i.am? Help Him Remix LMFAO’s “La La La”

Attention all aspiring DJs: Want to work with Will.I.Am? Calm down, we all do. That’s why you have to prove that your worth it, in the Pepsi Refresh Studio Challenge. Here’s how it works:

Head over to the Pepsi Refresh Studio. There, you’ll have the opportunity to remix LMFAO’s club hit “La La La.” Do whatever you want with it, be creative, and make it sound good. Click on the above video to hear LMFAO explain the rules to you themselves.

Then, Will.I.Am of the Black Eyed Peas will review the submissions, pick his favorite, add his own special flair, and make that the OFFICIAL remix. You can check out other examples over on their Youtube page. Or watch one of our favorites, ENZ, after the jump.

Think you can top the others? Enter the Refresh Studio here!

James: Leave Bullock out of it

Fashion house Ferragamo's museum goes online (Reuters)

EXCLUSIVE: Daddy Lohan on LiLo's Leaked Tape

Review: 'Precious' has power

'The Fourth Kind' of fake?

Review: New 'Christmas Carol' OK

New Woodrow Wilson bio presents a complex figure (AP)

AP - "Woodrow Wilson" (Knopf, 704 pages, $35), By John Milton Cooper Jr.: Soon after he was elected president in 1912, Woodrow Wilson told a former colleague at Princeton University that all of his preparation for office was in the domestic sphere and it would be "an irony of fate" if his administration were to be consumed by concerns over foreign policy.