Now that we know he's going to have influence in the training of a new breed of elite youth, we're beginning to get worried about this burgeoning shadow nation. And you should be, too. Below, we've compiled a slideshow of our evidence.

TV's class struggle

Artist Aura Rosenberg Is Loving Angels (of the Apocalypse) Instead

Rilke observed that "every angel is terrifying," and that certainly goes for the rapture-ready seraph floating through Aura Rosenberg's landscapes of glorious destruction. Rosenberg compiles her photo collages from a variety of sources — here an old diorama of Papua New Guinea from the Museum of Natural History, a Larry Burrow combat shot from the Vietnam War, and a photo of a construction pit on 60th and Broadway. (The angel is a friend of the artist.) On view in "Degrees of Remove: Landscape and Affect" at the Sculpture Center through November 30.

‘The Foot Fist Way’ Is Funniest Comedy of the Year—Really

Jody Hill’s redneck tae kwon do crazyfest, about a wayward loser trying to find new purpose in martial arts after his wife cheats, isn’t just the most underrated comedy of the year. It’s not even the best comedy starring redneck nutjob Danny McBride (who’s also starred in Tropic Thunder, Pineapple Express, and Drillbit Taylor), it’s the funniest comedy of the year — and if you don’t agree, McBride will kick you in the nuts.

Rumor: Marc by Marc Jacobs Store to Open in East Village

Fashionista reports a Marc by Marc Jacobs outpost may open in the East Village. Emphasis on may as this rumor originated at a party in London. We put in a call to Marc Jacobs's people, and they have confirmed there are no plans to open a new store in the East Village. We repeat: There are no plans to open a new Marc by Marc store in the East Village. So there you have it. [Fashionista]

Stations seek syndicated sitcoms

'The Given Day' is thoughtful, provocative (AP)

AP - "The Given Day" (William Morrow, 704 pages, $27.95), by Dennis Lehane: It's the fall of 1918, and the nation is in chaos.

Exclusive: Perry Farrell to Write Song for the ‘Twilight’ Movie, Possibly Reunite Jane’s Addiction

What's Perry Farrell up to these days? We're glad you asked! When he turned up at Fashion Week last week and performed with Dave Navarro at the Rose Bar, and again at a John Varvatos party, he set off rumors that Jane's Addiction might get back together. And they might! After the band's original lineup played a set at the NME awards in April, he told reporters a reunion was as likely as "there being commercial space flights." But last week he told us, "The trick is, I believe in commercial space flights. It could happen. Sure, why not? I've been working with [bassist Eric Avery] for seventeen years. That trumps everything."

In the meantime, though, Farrell has another huge gig coming up, and Vulture has the exclusive: He's writing a crucial song for Twilight, the movie adaptation of Stephenie Meyer's mega-selling young-adult vampire saga, due on November 21. The track is tentatively titled "Going All The Way (Into the Twilight)" and will be a Farrell solo venture produced by Atticus Ross and mixed by Alan Moulder. "I don't like to write albums anymore, because I have enough material in my life," Farrell told us. "I mean, I used to work on a record for, like, three and a half years and then people would only listen to or play two songs. I'd go, 'What happened to the other eleven songs?' So now I go, 'Here's one, here's one, here's one,' and they love them all."

PLAYBILL.COM'S THEATRE WEEK IN REVIEW: Going Global (Playbill)

‘The Only Son’ Captures the Other Rousseau’s Paris

French writer Stéphane Audeguy chose an obscure, but wonderfully eccentric protagonist for his second novel, The Only Son—the philosopher Jean-Jacques Rousseau’s older brother, François, who, disowned by his family, enters the demimonde that was eighteenth-century Paris. In John Cullen’s translation, the sensual decadence of the age is fully conveyed, from the goings-on of a Chinese bathhouse to the squalor in the Tour de la Comté. It’s an exuberant reply to the younger Rousseau’s fabled Confessions.

Chow to direct Columbia's 'Hornet'

Amicable Ending for A-Rod & Wife

PETA’s Next Target: Giorgio Armani

PETA's upset Giorgio Armani used fur in his fall collection after he told them he wouldn't, according to the New York Post. And it's not just a fur collar here and there — Armani designed floral-printed fur coats, fur-hemmed skirts, and fur-trimmed jackets. But the best part of his collection? Fur coats for babies. It might seem impractical to drape fur over a person who could spit up or drool at any moment, but let's be real — they're warm, and those plastic stroller bags are terribly unbecoming.

PETA president Dan Matthews said that tomorrow at a PETA benefit in Italy (who goes to those things?), Pamela Anderson (oh, right — her) would reveal plans to put "stars who attend Armani shows in the hot seat" and encourage them not to wear Armani creations for awards season. Jeez. Doesn't Anderson have a reality show she should be off filming? And more important, would PETA throw red paint on a baby?

PAM, PETA RAGE AT ARMANI [NYP]

Finally, Someone Made a Rap Video About Olafur Eliasson's Waterfalls

We don't know about you, but after the events of this week — during which the Dow moved more that 2000 points! — we're pretty delighted to see a video in which two white kids with Danish accents drop rhymes about Frank Lloyd Wright and rhyme Olafur Eliasson with "you lyin' son." Enjoy after the jump.

OLAFUR ELIASSON (A MILLI REMIX) [Modern Jackass]

Doughnuts and Death Threats

There have been a fair number of "slacktivist"-versus-police scuffles in the East Village lately, with the sans-culottes pelting the cops with pastries at a recent rally, but some locals think the anti-pig rhetoric has gone too far: "Throwing donuts and pies is O.K., funny, ha ha. But calling for death is anti-reasonable and uncivilized." Yeah and watch it with the day-old crullers. Those things can do some damage. [Villager]

Official: Every Living Artist Will Release an Album This Fall

More artists are joining the fourth-quarter music glut! In an interview on his satellite-radio station, Shade 45, Eminem said, "I'm concentrating on my own stuff right now — just banging out tracks." According to an Interscope spokesperson, we may see the finished product before the end of the year. The hilariously prolific Ryan Adams is getting in on the action, too, with the just-announced Cardinology, out at the end of next month. Also, next year, no albums will be released. [Billboard, Billboard]

Paramount Coldly Denies Blank Check to Steven Spielberg and Peter Jackson

Will the economic apocalypse hurt Hollywood? It's happening already! Steven Spielberg, the popular director behind such blockbusters as Jaws, Schindler's List, and the upcoming Mutt Williams and the Search for Elvis or Something, has been denied funding by Paramount for his planned two-movie adaptation of The Adventures of Tintin (Peter Jackson was to direct the second one). The original hope, according to Radar, was that Paramount would partner with Universal to share the cost of the first Tintin film (purportedly budgeted at $130 million), but Universal passed on it last month and now Paramount chief Brad Grey is saying he won't go it alone. In addition to the too-large budget, the other sticking point is Spielberg's standard demands for giant profit percentages: "Paramount won't pay Indiana Jones prices for a new franchise," says an insider. With millions already spent on a screenplay and motion capture, Spielberg and Jackson are left with little choice but to cast Shia LaBeouf in the lead role, a time-tested strategy that seems to get any old piece of crap green-lit these days.

Paramount Rebuffs Steven Spielberg [Radar]

Jillian Lewis Proves There’s Life After ‘Runway’

On last season's Project Runway, finalist Jillian Lewis’s feminine sportswear apparently wasn’t fierce enough to beat out Christian Siriano. But it did, thankfully, garner her enough attention to jump-start her career. This Sunday and Monday, she’ll be sitting in on the Guggenheim’s “Works and Process” series to speak about her costume design (we have sketches!) for choreographers Brian Reeder and Pam Tanowitz’s new work, A Two-Part Affair. Lewis chatted with us about life post-Runway (yes, it really does exist).

So how are the costumes coming along?
I’m like still in the beginning stages, it’s so last minute, it’s funny to talk about it while I’m still far from the end result! We’re full force working on it, but we just started yesterday. Hopefully it’ll be done by the night of the performance!

How did you get involved with Brian Reeder and Pam Tanowitz, the choreographers?
Actually, Brian and Pam were fans of the show. They contacted me through the Website. Then I met them, and they were really down-to-earth, really cool.

Do you have a dance background? I always noticed you had very good posture on Project Runway.
I have classical training as a dancer, I stopped when I was 17 and transitioned right away into becoming a fashion designer. It was like a choice between the two. I was really serious about it. I invested as much time into it as I do fashion.

What do you think of the current crop of Runway designers?
I watch every few episodes. It feels more like season one now, more experimental and less of a progression from the last season. I like Leanne. I think she has a lot of talent. She thinks about clothing more as an artist than a designer, and I really appreciate it. I really loved what she made for Diane Von Furstenberg — it seemed like she has experience when I saw that come out of her. I really think she’ll actually win.
(See the collections from this season's finalists.)

Is it easy or hard to move on to other things after the show?
It’s a little bit of both. It makes things easier in that people know who you are. If they’re a fan, they look for something you’ve done. I would never have gotten this project without Project Runway, and then with my private clients who I design dresses for, the same thing. On the other hand, you’re kind of tossed back into the world as if the eight months never happened. Financially it’s very difficult, and I think that’s why a lot of designers struggle. No one was joking when they said it takes money to make money.

Did you see Christian's runway show?
I saw it online, I didn’t see it in person because of my own deadlines. I thought it was fantastic. He really stepped up and did an amazing, real collection. I was truly impressed.

For showtimes and ticket info, go to Guggenheim.org.

Fall movies' dark star dilemma

Oprah makes latest book pick

Yankee Stadium Speaks, Mike Francesa Rants, and Jill Martin Is Stumped

As you might have heard, Yankee Stadium hosts its final game on Sunday night. There are countless reasons for the nostalgia starting a few weeks earlier than expected, but alas, here we are, no reason to dwell on it all. Let us all have our silent mourning and move along.

Not to be! The cover of the new Sports Illustrated, as thin as ever, blasts IT'S GONE with a picture of Maris and the Mick playing in front of a mostly empty Yankee Stadium in 1960. Tom Verducci then writes a nine-page cover story that's actually written in the first-person voice of Yankee Stadium. It's well-written, but the conceit starts to stretch at the seams; no colossus should ever be caught saying, "See, we're just like you, only without the bother of the respiratory and circulatory apparatus." We see.

Anyway, if you're feeling the need to express your sorrow, both Bronx Banter and Deadspin are calling for reader submissions. We encourage all correspondence to be written from the perspective of concrete.

There's a Reason It Wasn't "The Mad Dog and Mike" Show. Chris Russo's satellite-radio show began this week, but, not to be outdone, his former partner stole the headlines for a lengthy rant on Tuesday, bravely typed out by Neil Best, who apparently doesn't have an intern. (Does any man deserve one more?)

There's so much crazy here that we're not sure where to begin, but our favorite part was Mike Francesa's portrayal of Russo. Since the split, both have insisted it wasn't personal and there's no jealousy on either end. But it's hard not to notice that Francesa made a big point of saying that his solo ratings have always been better than Russo's. That is to say, Francesa was the draw all those years. Also, he's apparently very upset that Russo was interviewed a bunch of times, and he wasn't. (Um, sorry?) Maybe he's really not jealous — he's likely making more money than the Mad Dog, after all — but jeez, defensive, much?

This Isn't the Best Stuff on Earth. MSG Network's Jill Martin appeared on the Howard Stern Show this week and, when quizzed on Knicks trivia by Artie Lange, struggled to answer relatively simple questions like the years the team won the NBA title or where Stephon Marbury was born. Presumably Lange was trying to prove a point, that she's somehow unqualified to cover the team — perhaps because she's a woman? — but, whatever, he's a professional comedian, and it's a comedy show. But then it got weirder: Snapple joined in on the "fun," offering Martin $5,000 to come up with five Knicks facts for Snapple caps. All of which must thrill the Knicks since — oops! — Snapple's a team sponsor, and they're essentially mocking the credibility of one of its reporters.

Credit crunch no big deal at London Fashion Week (Reuters)

Bearish on the Bailout

Well! The stock market is rallying and Washington Mutual execs are surely clinking trillion-dollar glasses of champagne, but not everyone is cheering about the government's plan to "rescue" America. Bloomberg's Ann Woolner set a high bar for outrage at Wall Street greed early this morning with her column, evenly titled Sue Them, Jail Them, Make Them Pay for Meltdown "Toss the rascals in jail. Criminal prosecution allows the government to seize ill-gotten gains. Snip the straps off those golden parachutes and grab them. Take over bank accounts, investment accounts, mansions, private planes and yachts." (And raid their pot stash while you're at it.)

Conservatives are totally freaking out: "Our heads are spinning now with the bailout mania," Rep. Michele Bachmann from Minnesota said at a news conference. "First, we were told that Bear Stearns was too big to fail, then we were told that Freddie/Fannie were too big to fail, then we were told that AIG was too big to fail. What’s next, Starbucks is too big to fail?” (Actually, yes, we suspect The People would support a bailout of Starbucks with no problem whatsoever.) "In summary, this plan means our standard of living will drop in order to cover the mess Wall Street made while handing out those multi-million-dollar bonuses," fumed Seeing the Forest. But what's really got everyone's knickers twisted is the S.E.C.'s decision to follow the U.K.'s FSA and institute a temporary ban on short-selling.

The Daily Telegraph called it a "mind-blowingly stupid" knee-jerk reaction.

"To the extent that people are keeping money out of the market because they are petrified of short-sellers, convincing them that less short-selling is going on (even if it isn't) is an easy way to get more capital back into the market," writes Paul Kedrosky of Infectious Greed. "Granted, nothing has changed, but it's a fun superstition, sort of like sacrificing the odd virgin into a nearby volcano....The trouble is, of course, short-selling remains important. They are usually the best-informed traders in an issue, as repeated studies have shown. Their ability to bring prices in line is lost, or at least muted, and that can make subsequent price moves even more wild."

And Dealbreaker remembers what happened when Pakistan banned shorting, which turned out to be unwise. But they have a better sense of humor about it all than Nouriel Roubini, whose post today gave us actual chills. "At this point the perfect financial storm of the century cannot be contained. The only light at the end of the tunnel is the one of the coming financial and economic train wreck." The end?

Chicago hosts 'The Century' test

In Which Kim Cattrall Does Her Best Patricia Field Impersonation

The Sex and the City movie is almost out on DVD! And last night there was a party to celebrate the release and we were invited, naturally. We asked Kim Cattrall if she still gets wardrobe advice from SATC stylist Patricia Field. “You know, every time I see Pat, I say, 'What do you think? Do you like it? Do you like it?'" — here Cattrall slips into her best Pat Field hoarse voice — “‘I like it. It’s good. I like the purse better than the last purse,’” Cattrall said. "You know, she’s always chiming in. [Hoarse voice again] ‘That’s fierce, girl. Fierce.’” Her Pat voice was so amazing, it was the first time on the red carpet we wished we had a video camera.

So, How Bad Will This Week’s Financial Apocalypse Hurt Hollywood?

We were all set to ignore the financial crisis until someone actually fired us, but then we realized it may have already hit home — is Hollywood screwed? While plans for federal intervention have given the market a boost this morning, media-company stocks have been slumping all week, with just a slight uptick yesterday. Predictably, Hollywood executives are playing down concerns — DreamWorks' Jeffrey Katzenberg kept the faith at an investor conference, saying "we have seen that our product is, at worse, recession-resistant and, more optimistically and historically, has actually been recession-proof." Time Warner's Jeffery Bewkes even framed the down market as an opportunity, saying his company might take this time to expand film production. Really?

Times reports that DreamWorks SKG's half-billion-dollar deal with Indian company Reliance is being held up because there is still several hundred million dollars in debt financing left to be raised. Banks had already been pulling out of movie-studio investments over the last year thanks to the housing crisis, and Monday's turmoil will most likely just accelerate the trend. This may not necessarily be a terrible thing — less money being thrown around could mean more careful decisions and less terrible movies — but when was the last time Hollywood reacted calmly and reasonably to a crisis?

Can Leo & Kate Recreate 'Titanic' Success?

Paul McCartney

Heather Mills to Donate $1 Million in Food to Hunts Point Children’s Charity

File this under: Nice Things Done by a Celebrity Whose Soul You'd Maybe Already Given Up On. Plucky, loudmouthed Heather Mills is doing a lovely thing: She's donating $1 million in food products to the children of Hunts Point in the South Bronx, an oft-overlooked neighborhood where nearly half of local families live below the poverty level. She'll make the donation ceremonially tomorrow in Hunts Point Riverside Park with Congressman José Serrano, where she'll get an honorary congressional award and will help grill meatless hot dogs and burgers for the kids of the Hunts Point Alliance for Children, of which she is honorary chairperson. (Yes, all of the food Mills will donate will be of the meatless variety. In addition to being a well-known vegan and adorably deranged PETA-supporter, she says she's concerned about the way kids in the neighborhood have been eating.)

Mills won $50 million dollars in her divorce settlement with ex-husband Paul McCartney earlier this year, an amount she has alternately said she was outraged and happy with. The activist and former model has lived only part-time in New York since June (in the glamorous Richard Meier Perry Street buildings), but has already become heavily involved with the children's charity.

The Hunts Point Back to School Fair [HPAC]

Iranian director Samira Makhmalbaf

British actor David Thewlis, US actress Vera Farmiga and British director Mark Herman

Dogged by Controversy, 'Hounddog' Opens

WGA East votes for incumbents

Cruise: Katie's B'way Debut 'Extraordinary'

Report: Playboy Producer Sues Over Sexual Behavior

DreamWorks, Reliance close deal

French director Laurent Cantet

Henry Ziegler Steinway

Emmys bump up against reality

Indian cricketer Harbhajan Singh

'Mentalist,' 'Gary,' a new ride, and more 'Heroes' (AP)

AP - The fall TV season officially starts Monday, and NBC will pop the cork with its returning "Heroes" (a two-hour opener airs Monday at 9 p.m. EDT). CBS is ringing in the new year with "The Mentalist" (premiering 9 p.m. EDT Tuesday) and "Gary Unmarried" (8:30 p.m. EDT Wednesday). NBC hits the road with its new-model 'Knight Rider' (8 p.m. EDT Wednesday).