"The eye patch-wearing star behind '80s rap classics like 'La-Di-Da-Di' and 'Children's Story' was a successful rapper when he was convicted of shooting his cousin and another man in 1991. Both survived.
"'Mr. Walters has fully served the sentence imposed upon him for his convictions, had an exemplary disciplinary record while in prison and on parole, and has been living without incident in the community for more than 10 years,' [Governor] Paterson said. 'I urge federal immigration officials to once again grant Mr. Walters relief from deportation, so that he is not separated from his many family members who are United States citizens, including his two teenage children.'" [AP]
Jessica Simpson hopped off her flight from Mexico and jumped right back to work.
The pop star, who returned to Los Angeles yesterday after spending a few days unwinding (from what, we...
At first it seemed like overkill, being able to download American Idol performances from iTunes the day after they aired.
Until we realized we could pay 99 cents and listen to David...
Walking her first red carpet since Heath Ledger's death, Michelle Williams was glowing in an über-feminine Chanel lace number at last night's premiere of her new film, Wendy and Lucy,...
Sean "Diddy" Combs—rap mogul, entrepreneur, and ladies man—is not romancing Babyface's and, more recently, Eddie Murphy's, ex lady love, Tracey Edmonds.
A rep...
Photo: Andrew Lichtenstein/Polaris
John McCain tried to stay (metaphorically) aboard the Straight Talk Express while explaining how the Iraq war could be won by 2013. Former state First Lady Silda Wall Spitzer gave a showstopping solo turn at a charity event; husband Eliot surfaced, in a way, as the inspiration for a gov-love story line on Law & Order. Governor Paterson underwent emergency eye surgery to stop migraines caused by glaucoma. Staten Island congressman Vito Fossella backed off his reelection plans to “concentrate on healing the wounds that I have caused to my wife and family.” (He declined to specify which family.) Arbitrators granted city police a 10 percent raise, while the NYPD announced that the three cops cleared in the Sean Bell shooting faced possible dismissal from the force.
A purse snatcher who'd terrorized subway riders was nabbed in a homeless shelter. JPMorgan Chase's Jamie Dimon promised to keep 45 percent of Bear Stearns' employees. Rupert Murdoch installed lieutenant Robert Thomson as managing editor of The Wall Street Journal. Katie Holmes scheduled a Broadway run in Arthur Miller's All My Sons. Mets manager Willie Randolph blamed racism for negative press, then apologized. The Brooklyn Bridge celebrated its 125th birthday with fireworks. And the once-condemned Saint Brigid's Church on Avenue B found salvation — after being touched by a mystery angel with $20 million to spare. —Mark Adams
If it's treasure Indiana Jones wants, he'll have to wait for the weekend to collect the lion's share of it.
Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull opened Thursday...
The state of New York feels Slick Rick has atoned for his sins. (And we don't mean his excessive bling in the late 1980s.)
In light of Rick's service to his community and clean...
Talk about a decoy.
While we would normally be tempted to comment on Britney Spears' colorful dress or even her matted hair, we can't help but be more than a little distracted by...
And at Harvard, Oppenheim clashed with campus feminists, particularly when they wouldn't sleep with him. In a final column for the Harvard Crimson, Oppenheim wrote: "Apparently, it is easy to blame the patriarchy for all of your woes, and to silence your opponents with accusations of misogyny, but it is more difficult to actually deny oneself the pleasures of cavorting with said patriarchy's handsome sons."
Those articles remain on the web notwithstanding their abuse of bad-mouthed snobbish college girls and cowardly anti-war journalists. But a 2005 article by TV Newser's Brian Stelter (now a ferociously hard-working media reporter at the New York Times) about Oppenheim—Noah Oppenheim, Part Of America's First Family (What Do Capus & Brokaw Think?)— has mysteriously disappeared from the website.
Chris Ariens, Stelter's successor, knows Oppenheim vaguely from their time together at MSNBC. On the phone, he said he removed the item neither out of friendship or in response to a legal notice. But NBC flack Megan Kopf had told him the blog post showed up high in a search for Oppenheim's name, and linked to an article that was "potentially slanderous." (Anyone have a copy?)
TV Newser's Ariens is a wimp for accomodating NBC's pressure, but forget about him. Oppenheim ought to have a higher tolerance for "potential slander", having himself doled out so much of it.
And now I'm off.
Photo: Sophie Donelson
On that note, we're off. Daily Intel is going to take a brief hiatus with our suntan lotion and smelling salts, until after Memorial Day. We just have a few more days to enjoy the Gossip Girl episodes left on our DVRs (they're getting swallowed up, as always, by a never-ending stream of Law & Order: SVU), and we want to focus. Like a hibernating bear, we've got to store up for the long off-season, so we can go out and devour the show again upon its return. See you Tuesday!
Related: Gossip Girl archive
Photo: WireImage
Charlie apparently claimed that Denise, the mother of two of his children, sent him an e-mail asking for his sperm so that she could have a third child.
Denise denied it, telling the Post, "I don't want Charlie's prostitute-tranny-infested sperm."
Then she said Charlie sent her a text message saying, "I hope you and your worthless, retarded father get cancer and join your stupid mom. Rot in hell, you fucking whore."
"I am so over him," she told the Post. "He's disgusting, and he's hit an all-time low."
Right.
It's safe to say that the world has hit an all-time low, because coverage of these disgusting people is international fucking news, and Us Weekly is actually asking people if they are on Team Charlie or Team Denise, as if anyone would want to be on either team, and Denise Richards has a reality show, which means that this could all go on in perpetuity. It must, Daily Intel readers, be stopped. Here's why: It's only a matter of time before someone makes a T-shirt featuring a phrase plucked from their catchy banter, and then said T-shirt will then be worn by a member of a band like Fallout Boy during an awards show, and that will subsequently enrage a Republican member of Congress, who will turn it into an incident with a phrase attached to it like "wardrobe malfunction" that will become an Internet meme and eventually be recorded in the OED, where, along with the Armenian genocide and other human atrocities, it will exist as a reminder of a period of human history wherein people demonstrated a terrible, unthinkable capacity for base, stupid cruelty. So! Let's nip this in the bud, shall we?
Related: Let's Never Hear About Austrian Incest Dad Ever Again
Looking back on the worst week ever...
Denial:
How could wonderful little David Archuleta possibly have lost? He sang flawlessly on Tuesday night, just as he has all season! Even Simon told him he'd scored a knockout victory, capably transforming even the world's crappiest song into one besting the collective efforts of Beethoven, the Beatles, and the finest angel choirs in all of Heaven! Clearly Wednesday's American Idol finale was all just some awful dream, shared simultaneously by 31.7 million viewers.
Anger:
Shut up, David Cook! You're bald! And a bad guitar player! Plus, you look a little like Philip Seymour Hoffman! We hate grunge versions of eighties songs — and you! You're not fit to carry the Jonas Brothers' tambourine case! People only voted for you ironically!
Bargaining:
David Archuleta still gets a record deal, right? At least we have his fantastic albums to look forward to, don't we? And even if we're the only ones who buy them, he can still mount a comeback on Broadway, right? RIGHT?
Depression:
Oh, what's the point? There's simply no recovering from this.
Acceptance:
We have not yet reached this stage. Posting will resume on Tuesday. Enjoy the long weekend — we know we won't.
Courtesy of Paramount
1. How exactly — after watching the Ark of the Covenant melt a squadron of Nazis, and drinking from the Holy Grail — does Indy remain so skeptical about everything? At this point, wouldn't he just shrug and be like, "Sure, aliens, city of gold, why not?"
2. What exactly is the tensile strength of that snake Shia used to haul Indy and Marian out of the sand pit? Is it enough to, as Indy suggests earlier, lift a car? We sort of think no.
3. Is it considered appropriate to sing the recently-unearthed lyrics to John Williams's theme song during the movie?
4. What happened to the cheesy payoff we expected for that line, early in the movie, in which Indy tells Mutt that bites from big scorpions are nothing to worry about, but if you get bit by a little scorpion, "Don't keep it to yourself"? We expected a scene near the climax where Mutt needs to choose between leaping into a pit full of big scorpions and a pit full of little ones. Did that get cut out of this draft?
5. Whose decision was it to dramatically re-enact the genocide of South American native peoples, when the Commies machine-gunned all those ancient Incan warriors? That was a nice touch.
6. Okay, in that scene where Shia LaBeouf swings more than a mile through the jungle on vines alongside hundreds of pompadoured monkeys — where were the Ewoks?
7. If the Crystal Skull can get our gang out of scrape after scrape — from killer red ants to scary, slingshot-wielding Incan warriors — would it work in the real world too? Could Indy just wave the skull at a cop who pulls him over? Could we use it to get into Momofuku Ko?
8. That CGI prairie dog whose quizzical look is the punch-line to the scene where Indy survives the nuclear blast in a refrigerator — he dies of radiation sickness an hour later, right?
9. How come alien crystal magnetism only works when you're looking at it?
10. Was knowledge their treasure? Or was it that their treasure was knowledge?
What did you think? What questions did Indy's close encounters leave you with? Let us know in the comments!
Earlier: In Defense of Shia LaBeouf As the Next Indy
Vulture Watches the Next Three Indy Movies
Related: David Edelstein on Indiana Jones
2. Donnis, "L.O.V.E."
After musical dalliances with M.I.A. and Santogold, it sounds like Atlanta-based Donnis is ready to settle down for a solo album, perhaps, with this not-bad ode to monogamy. [Discobelle]
3. Estelle feat. Busta Rhymes, "American Boy (remix)"
We're not sure this Busta-enhanced remix adds much to one of our favorite summer jams so far, but it's nice to know it exists in case we ever get tired of the original (unlikely!). [First Up]
4. Bon Iver, "Skinny Love" (live on Later... with Jools Holland
The studio audience had big, fat love for Bon Iver's Justin Vernon when he performed this track from his most recent record on the popular British TV show. [Culture Bully]
5. Adventure, "Battle Cat"
It's 3 a.m., you're under the influence of a variety of chemicals, and you're watching He-Man cartoons while playing Super Mario Brothers on your cell phone. This is your soundtrack. [ Aural States] —Ehren Gresehover
Photo: Getty Images
Doonan just returned from England, where his memoir Nasty: My Family and Other Glamorous Varmints is being made into a TV series for the BBC. "They just cast it, so I got to meet all the people who are playing me and my family," Doonan said. "But they haven’t announced it yet, so I can’t say who it is. But lots of them are really well known." — Randi Eichenbaum
Usher feat. Young Jeezy, "Love in This Club"
Yes, the first single from Usher's Here I Stand — a soulful request to Ush's ladyfriend to copulate in the middle of a crowded dance floor — is totally idiotic. It's also purportedly constructed exclusively from samples that come included with Apple's GarageBand. Even so, it's probably best not to count it out. 2004's "Yeah!" wasn't exactly "God Only Knows," and that did okay. Plus, there are enough remixes of this track to give it a second chart life once the original's run its course (you've already heard the Lil Wayne-Beyoncé version, and there's allegedly one with Jay-Z on the way too). Also, the hook is sort of growing on is, unsanitary though it may be. Worst-case scenario: This will be a massive club hit (at least until people actually start befouling dance floors).
MEDIA
• Presidential hopeful John McCain released his medical records to the media this morning, but his campaign decided not to let the New York Times be one of the first outlets to have access. [NYT]
• The Wall Street Journal is moving away from Wall Street as the broadsheet prepares to shack up at the News Corp. building in midtown come next year. [DealBreaker]
• Is Time Warner going to merge with NBC Universal? [Media Money]
REAL ESTATE
• The Verizon building at 375 Pearl Street is being reclad, and everyone seems pretty excited about it. After all, the building has been dubbed the "ugliest skyscraper" in New York. [City Room/NYT]
• Meanwhile, Harlem's Kalahri building is often cited as the ugliest new condo in the city. [Curbed]
• Details on Frank Gehry's Beekman Tower have emerged. [Curbed]
LAW
• New York firm Milberg Weiss is being sued for allegedly obtaining $251 million in attorney fees through illegal payments to name plaintiffs. [Law.com]
• A number of lawyers are leaving the profession for other job fields. [Law.com]
• This whole downsizing trend for summer-associate programs that's been rocking the legal world lately might be a bit overly alarmist. [Above the Law]
I wrote this so non-sports people could understand it, because it is important.
The party is really going to be saturated in crystal, starting with the pink carpet covered in thousands of dollars' worth of crystals. We’re also using beautiful heart ornaments sprinkled in the trees in the garden at MoMA, creating a twinkling effect. We’re working on the cocktail trays, too. Swarovski is going to create these crystallized logos of Sex and the City that they’re going to incorporate into custom-made trays to pass the food. That’s going to be hot.
Sounds more like Kira Plastinina's birthday party than a swanky premiere. Sigh. At least they're serving booze.
Sex and the City Premiere Producer: Party Will Be "Saturated in Crystal" [BizBash]
Photo: Getty Images
Did you know it was going to cause such a stir? The New York Times piece seems to have set people off...
That was the first piece that came out, but now everyone’s complaining. I don’t see how you can make an honest telling of the story and make either side happy. It’s just impossible, because it was no one’s finest hour. In the last few days, there’s literally been 20 or 30 articles on it. Everyone’s griping. Everyone’s complaining. But the overall sense you get is that the film got it right. We’ve always believed that the film got it right. And I expect many more people complaining that what we’ve heard so far, and if they weren’t, that would mean that we hadn’t told the story truthfully.
We guess it can’t be a priority to make people happy when you’re making a movie like this.
Exactly! We never intended to make anyone happy.
In case you hadn’t noticed, we’re big fans of Buffy and Gilmore Girls. Have you abandoned acting entirely?
The focus now is definitely screenwriting. With acting, I used to take absolutely anything that was offered to me. Now that’s just...not the case.
How did the idea for this project come about?
I saw a play called Stuff Happens at the Mark Taper Forum, which chronicled the build-up to the Iraqi war told from many different perspectives, and I was so inspired by the play that as I walked out of the theater I told myself, I have to write something like this. The idea for Recount popped into my head literally about 30 seconds later. I didn’t really know much about the Florida recount except for the news blurbs that we all saw on TV. So I got in my car, jammed home, found a few used books on Amazon — you know, the 99 cent ones? — and got to work. Halfway through the first book I thought, Oh my god, this could make the most amazing movie. Because no one knows the true story! It all kind of died after 9/11.
Obviously [director] Jay Roach is known for his comedies. Was that cause for concern?
Well, you know, Jay Roach is a winner. That’s all Jay is. Everything he sets out to do, he succeeds 1000 percent. Austin Powers, Meet the Parents, Borat — these projects are cultural phenomenons and they’re completely successful pieces of entertainment. He’s also the Zen master.
Really?
Really. He’s calm, he’s sweet. He’s the antithesis of everything you would expect from a Hollywood director. You expect these comedy guys to be these big comedy personalities — and they usually are — but he’s the opposite.
Well, obviously the project went well. What’s next?
I’m about to start writing the story of Brown v. Board of Education. One of my first jobs out of college was as the third assistant to Gary Ross. He ended up reading Recount and called to ask me to write this movie for him. And I thought, Wow, if I can write a movie for the guy I used to bring Diet Cokes to, that would be. . .pretty cool. That and the fact that it’s an amazing, amazing story that I’d really feel honored to work on. It’s corny, but it’s true. —Sara Cardace
Earlier: Warren Christopher Angry at ‘Buffy’ Nerd Over ‘Recount’
Related: John Leonard Reviews Recount
Laura Dern on Playing Katherine Harris
Related:Video: The Premiere of HBO's ‘Recount’ [Daily Intel]
David Holzer's Rockland
County McMansion.Photo: nydailynews.com
Photo: Courtesy of Calvin Klein
"It really taps into the secrecy of a private moment — where it's clear that Eva is having illicit thoughts," said Lori Singer, vice president of global marketing for the brand at Coty Prestige, "It's somewhat up to interpretation — because of how it's shot, and what you see and hear, and what you can't see and hear. You hear her voice, talking about having a sexy secret."
Sounds like every Victoria's Secret commercial we've ever seen. Another Coty rep said they plan to fight for their commercial — a cause we can totally get behind. A little lightening up would do this country good. By our calculations no one has yet died from Janet Jackson's boob fiasco and look how much stress we wasted freaking out about that. We can't imagine five extra seconds of Mendes's bare thighs will send anyone into a frenzy either (except at the networks).
Unspoken Passion [WWD]
Photo: Getty Images
"I've had to show him how to roll blunts. That's important to the story." —Lil' Cease on the coaching he's giving actor Marc John Jeffries on the set of the Biggie biopic Notorious [MTV]
"I want to make a movie about Ed Gein. In fact I was talking about it with (film composer) Danny Elfman not so long ago. I could see it happening. Everyone's interested in Ed Gein." —Errol Morris on a potential documentary about the popular serial killer [Star Tribune via Popmatters]
"I'm actually still waiting for the phone call from Paramount producers saying, 'You know what Zoe? That skirt wasn't short enough.' — Zoe Saldana, Lt. Uhura in the new Star Trek film, on rumors that the uniforms in the film are shorter than the ones in the original series [io9]
"There are four girls and four storylines and in these syndicated ones, there are usually three storylines and like, oh Charlotte says like, 'Hi' and we never see her again for the rest of the episode. She's like the 'up the butt girl' that time or whatever." — Cynthia Nixon on the censored reruns of Sex and the City [Comingsoon.net]
Hagee, left; older gentleman.Photo: AP
• Jonathan Martin thinks it's a shrewd move to dump these pastors now, while the media is mostly distracted by veep talk and his own medical records, and it's far enough from the general election that it will likely be forgotten by voters. [Politico]
• Josh Marshall says he doesn't think McCain knew about the Hitler statements, but given all the other things Hagee has said, it really shouldn't have come as a surprise. [Talking Points Memo]
• Matthew Yglesias wonders if this could be the beginning of a "high-risk, high-reward" McCain strategy of separating himself from the party (as conservatives have "nowhere else to go") and appealing to voters in the middle. [Atlantic]
• Holly Bailey thinks it's a guarantee that people are digging for more pastor gold and that we probably haven't heard the last of Hagee. [Stumper/Newsweek]
• John Nichols isn't sure what Hagee's de-endorsement of McCain really means. Hagee still believes McCain is "the candidate most in line with his religious and political views," which should be what concerns people. [Campaign '08/Nation]
• Eve Fairbanks concurs. What is a "de-endorsement"? [Stump/New Republic]
• Matt Lewis thinks the "attacks" on Hagee are liberal payback for the Reverend Wright affair and an attempt to win over some skeptical Jewish voters. He's disappointed that McCain didn't show more "toughness." [Town Hall]
• Dan Gilgof places McCain's latest stumble in the context of his overall "ham handed approach to dealing with the Christian Right and with handling religious matters generally." The Hagee disaster will likely make McCain even more hesitant to reach out to the religious right later in the campaign. [God-o-Meter/BeliefNet]
• Domenico Montanaro posits that maybe McCain's "anxiousness about Evangelical support" caused him to jump the gun on these endorsements and not properly vet them first. [First Read/MSNBC] —Dan Amira
Earlier: Ellen DeGeneres Makes John McCain All Uncomfortable About Gay Marriage
For a complete and regularly updated guide to presidential candidates Hillary Clinton, Barack Obama, and John McCain — from First Love to Most Embarrassing Gaffe — read the 2008 Electopedia.
Photo illustration: Courtesy of Paramount
But we disagree!
Spoilers ahead: Crystal Skull certainly doesn't shy away from the possibility of Shia taking over the franchise: LaBeouf plays Jones's son, Mutt Williams, and the film ends with Mutt thoughtfully fingering Jones's trademark fedora — before Indy snatches it out of his hand with a grin. It's a moment that will annoy a lot of fans who think they're being strong-armed into accepting Shia as the future of the franchise. But as much as we love classic Indy, we think LaBeouf could pull it off.
He's already proved he can carry a movie, even one — like Transformers — in which the screen is overwhelmed with millions of dollars of CGI madness. And the question of whether he has the acting chops to pull of the role is moot, because playing Indy isn't about acting — it's about charming. No one ever accused Harrison Ford of being a Shakespearean master, least of all Ford himself, who's always been nonchalant about the craft of acting. What Ford has brought to the role for 27 years is a certain kind of insouciant charm, a charm that Shia LaBeouf shares. They're both a little bit cocky, especially when completely out of their depths — that's where their charm comes from. Indy isn't at his best when he's winning; he's at his best when he's losing, and he can't stop a bitter wisecrack from popping out anyways.
LaBeouf has shown he can be that kind of guy too — and we'll take as our proof not a movie role but a real-life goof-up, the night LaBeouf was arrested for refusing to leave a Chicago Walgreens. Unlike most celebrities, whose mugshots are abashed, bewildered, or downright terrifying, LaBeouf chose the moment the shutter clicked to flash a wry smile, one that seemed to say, "Yeah, you got me, but check out what I do next." If you look closely at that little half-smile, it begins to look familiar. It's quite similar, in fact, to the half-smile that Harrison Ford made famous.
Related: An Evolved Spielberg Humdrums Through ‘Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull’
Vulture Watches the Next Three Indy Movies
Conan O’Brien on ‘Indiana Jones 4’: ‘I Liked the Ants’
Photo: AFP/Getty Images
An Engineering Marvel Born in Tragedy [City Room/NYT]
Inspiring, no?Photo: FilmMagic
• Mario Testino says he loves Agyness Deyn and dropped her from the Burberry campaign because he wanted a different concept for the forthcoming season, not because she's too famous. [NYP]
• Here's a long essay about the clothes in the Sex and the City movie. The only part that comes close to surprising is that Miranda reportedly looks quite polished, better than she did in the series. Perhaps Charlotte's the frumpy one this time around. [WWD]
• Behati Prinsloo is the new face of Victoria's Secret's Pink line. The 19-year-old Namibia native could be the next big spokesmodel for the company. Project Phase Out Heidi Klum starts: now. [NYP]
• Victoria's Secret's international headquarters are on Broadway and 55th Street, so, uh, go look for models there or something. [NYP]
• Stella McCartney will present her spring 2009 collection at a garden party in New York. We already feel sugarplums dancing in our heads. [WWD]
• News for rich people: Badgley Mischka is launching a fine-jewelry collection with pieces starting at $2,000. [WWD]
• Karl Lagerfeld will have a photography show at Versailles this summer to remind us all that only he gets to hold his photography show at Versailles. [WWD]
• Madonna didn't show up to the party Diane von Furstenberg held in her honor on her yacht in Cannes because she was "taking meetings." [NYDN]
• Gisele Bundchen on if she'd get plastic surgery: "Actually, I asked my mother the very same question and she said, 'It's taken me 58 years for me to look like this. You think I'm going to ruin it now?" Touché. [British Vogue]
• Jonathan Kelsey made a pair of "Amy" shoes for Amy Winehouse, which you can buy in London for almost $750. What are you waiting for? It's a three-day weekend! [British Vogue]
What anonymous child might have benefited from
an education at the Little Red Schoolhouse?
The world will never know.Photo: istockphoto
Quoth the Times:
He was shocked when a school official immediately informed him the school would hold him accountable for all of it — the whole tuition, a commitment he had made when he signed the contract back in February.
David and Michelle were consumed with angst and tore their hair and probably said some regrettable things to school officials. But a contract is a contract, and like Fannie Mae and Sallie Mae and all those other sweetly named money eaters, the school did not budge. Schools, the Times tells us today, "do not relish searching for replacement students just when half their application pool is heading for the beach." So, ultimately, the Benders ended up paying $20,000 to a school their child was not going to. Michelle wrote a check for the last installment last week, the Times says, and as she did so, tears rolled down her cheeks.
But is that where the story ends? Are Michelle and David the only victims? How else might this small act have reverberated across New York City?
Flash forward ten years: Lily is walking down the street toward her Soho apartment, which has appreciated in value and is now worth $900,000,000,000. She is the youngest-ever head of surgery at a prestigious hospital, and in her mind she is curing cancer when, suddenly, the heel of her $4,000 shoe catches on something. It's a person. A bum, of indeterminate gender. Lily looks down into its grubby face. "Who are you?" she asks, puzzled. "I'm the person that didn't get into the Little Red Schoolhouse," the bum says. "I was the next in line after you. You ruined my life. I was going to cure cancer." Then the bum dies. Lily goes into a deep depression. Cancer remains uncured.
The end.
A School That Cost $20,000 Not to Go To [NYT]
Photo: Getty Images
As well as establishing herself as a credible fashion-world force, Beckham has been keen to win the hearts of the American public since moving her family to LA with husband David last year, and a regular slot on such a popular mainstream show will no doubt help her cause.
We wouldn't say crusading through paps in tube tops and push-up bras in the name of fame is a cause that needs help. No siree, we think she's got her cause down and we don't think acting will help it. Yes, her cameo on Ugly Betty, in which she played/mocked herself, was rather brilliant. But can she really sustain such on-point self-mockery in a recurring role? She nailed every joke one could make about her, but is she dimensional enough to warrant another appearance? What we usually love about her is that she doesn't leave us asking questions or wanting more (Becks on the other hand...), and we're perfectly content to get our Vicky Beckham fix from those pap photos. And frankly, we're not that interested in seeing her play a character. She's already the best character she can be.
A Victoria Return [British Vogue]
Photo: Getty Images
Photographer Mario Testino denied that Agyness Deyn was dropped from Burberry because she is "too famous," saying that it was simply a case of them wanting a "different concept for their forthcoming season." (Also, she's moving to Williamsburg.) Denise Richards responded to Charlie Sheen's allegations that she'd sent him e-mails asking for his sperm by producing nasty text messages he'd sent her. Michael Lohan is suing ex-wife Dina because he wants to see his kids more. Ex-lovers Madonna and Sean Penn are staying at the same hotel in Cannes, but are avoiding each other like the plague. Also at Cannes, Sharon Stone left a dinner in her honor after only a few minutes because she said she felt like she was "having a stroke." Former Interview editor Ingrid Sischy is staying with partner Sandy Brant at Elton John's villa in Nice. Harrison Ford and lady friend Calista Flockhart ate at the Waverly Inn. Former "Page Six"–er and Radar editor Christopher Tennant's book about rich people was previewed in Vanity Fair. Jimmy Carter helped build houses for Habitat for Humanity in Louisiana.
Translation: "My name is Benjamin Button." (Thanks, six years of high-school and college Spanish!)
The Verdict: Debuting in theaters before Indiana Jones this weekend is the trailer (only the Spanish version has surfaced on YouTube so far) for David Fincher's much-anticipated take on F. Scott Fitzgerald's short story about a guy who's born an old man and ages in reverse. If done wrong, the special effects required to put Brad Pitt's 44-year-old face on a 90-year-old's body might've looked scary and ridiculous — like the ones in the Wayans brothers' Little Man and R. Kelly's alleged sex tape. But this actually looks completely amazing and totally non-terrifying. Past the CGI, the movie looks pretty great too and, based on trailer alone, is already being hailed as an early Oscar contender. We sort of can't wait to see this.
(Note: When the above version inevitably gets taken down in a few minutes, you can probably still see it here.)
Photo: nydailynews.com
Seriously. This happened to some random straight dude? Gay men and women have been fantasizing about this exact scenario (even, secretly, the Nick Lachey part) for years. Life is so unfair.
Brooklyn man rescued by mystery surfer wants to show his gratitude [NYDN]
Photo: Getty Images
Bow Wow Gets an Entourage: Actor-rapper Bow Wow, né Lil' Bow Wow, has joined the fifth season of HBO's Entourage as a new standup-comedy client represented by E. "After 16 years in the music industry and six successful albums, I've decided to shift my energy to something else I'm passionate about, acting. I'm going to try to be the next Will Smith." Fair enough! Start by consistently opening movies at number one every summer for the rest of your life. [HR]
Bender Heads to Motown: Lost director Jack Bender will helm ABC's drama pilot The Prince of Motor City, starring Andie MacDowell (so that's what she's been up to!). Story follows a family in the world of Detroit's auto business. It's said to have Hamlet undertones, which might be code for "everyone dies at the end of the pilot." If so, awesome. [Variety]
Happy Birthday, Randolph: United Artists has tapped Charles Randolph to adapt Stanley N. Alpert's The Birthday Party. Our first thought: Birthday parties are boring. Our second thought: Oh wait, this is the guy who survived a 25-hour kidnapping on the eve of his 38th birthday. That wasn't boring at all. [HR]
Neill Lost at Sea: Sam Neill, Sean Bean, and Joss Ackland have joined NBC's action series Crusoe, based on Daniel Defoe's Robinson Crusoe. The series will focus on Crusoe and his guy Friday, lost on an island with flashbacks to fill in the story. So now in addition to being "part MacGyver, part contemporary morality tale about race and personal discovery, part comedy, and part Cast Away meets Survivor," it's also Lost. [HR]
Three Before 24: Eric Lively (Gossip Girl's Blake Lively's brother), Gil Bellows (Ally McBeal), and Tony Todd will round of the cast of Fox's 24 prequel, the story of how Jack Bauer battled an international crisis in Africa. And thanks to his daring exploits, all of Africa's problems got solved. [HR]
STARTING TODAY
• The spring and summer collection at Bally is 60 percent off. Through mid-June. 628 Madison Ave., at 59th St. (212-751-9082); Mon.–Wed., Fri., Sat. (10–6:30), Thurs. (10–7), Sun. (12–5).
• Clothing and shoes at Jeffrey are 25 percent off. So far, Jonathan Saunders, Michael Kors, and Martin Grant are all marked down. 449 W. 14th St., nr. Ninth Ave. (212-206-1272); Mon.–Wed., Fri. (10–8), Thurs. (10–9), Sat. (10–7), Sun. (12:30–6).
• Blow the New York Blow Dry Bar, a meatpacking staple, just opened up a second location in the Upper East Side, and they’re celebrating with 50-percent-off deals on blowouts (originally priced at $40, $50, and $60, depending on length and texture). Through 7/31. 843 Lexington Ave., nr. 64th St., second fl. (212-452-0246); Mon.–Fri. (8–8), Sat. (10–8), Sun. (12–6).
ENDING TODAY
• For only two days, find 90 percent off bra-and-panty sets, swimsuits, camisoles, and ready-to-wear items from Araks. Through 5/23. 137 Grand St., nr. Crosby St., fifth fl. (212-982-5652); Thurs. (8:30–7:30), Fri. (9-6–30).
• The signature rectangular women’s and men’s eyewear from Alain Mikli International normally retails for $200 to $700 but is on sale for $45 to $95 at this sample sale. 264 W. 40th St., nr. Seventh Ave.; Tues.–Thurs. (9–5:45), Fri. (9–5).
ENDING TOMORROW
• Anbar Shoes is clearing out its spring and summer stock with a huge sale featuring 40-percent-off prices. Shoes from BCBG, Lulu Guinness, Betsey Johnson, and more retailed for upwards of $400 but are now $20 to $100. Through 5/24. 60 Reade St., nr. Church St. (212-227-0253); Mon.–Fri. (9–6:20), Sat. (11–5:45), Sun. (closed).
ENDING SUNDAY
• A few indie designers are getting together for a big sample sale this weekend. Bijules jewelry, Sirhaves (babywear for mini-hipsters), Bliss Lau handbags, and clothes from Form and Wifebeader by Laura Dahl will be available at reduced prices. Through 5/25. 425 W. 13th St., at Washington St., fourth fl.; Fri.–Sun. (noon–7).
ONLINE DEALS THROUGH MONDAY
• Barneys New York has a private sale online, where you can stock up on designers like Christian Louboutin and Viktor & Rolf for 40 percent off or more. Through 5/28.
• Get your fill of brown bags at the Bloomingdale’s sale this weekend where you can find 40 percent off women’s, men’s, handbags, accessories, shoes, and more. Through 5/27.
• The half-yearly sale at Nordstrom.com starts now, featuring 40 percent off or more on men’s, women’s, shoes, and accessories.
• ShopJake.com takes 40 percent off men’s and women’s items at its annual sale, featuring designers like Alexander Wang, doo.ri, 3.1 phillip lim, Martin Margiela, Loeffler Randall, and Giuseppe Zanotti.
• Edressme.com is taking 30 percent off for Memorial Day weekend.
• The indie designer stock at BadJoan.com, like Desanka, Kate & Kass, and Marcello Toshi, is 80 percent off when you sign up for their newsletter. E-mail Joan your e-address and get the discount code when she writes back.
• Get 40 percent off your purchase of Smashbox cosmetics when you enter FFSB08 at online checkout.
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