Preston, a knight in shining gay armor.Photo: Patrick McMullan

Photo: Newscom

The Hills' Heidi Does a Line

Due to Illness, This Weekend's Scheduled Sex Jams Will Be Performed by a Slightly Different Singer

Photo: Getty Images

Janet Out, Mariah In: Citing the flu, Janet Jackson has canceled her appearance on Saturday Night Live this weekend. Luckily, Mariah Carey, too, is in the midst of promoting an album fully of smutty R&B jams, and she's agreed to perform in her stead. [AP]

Wooden Actor to Be on Funny Show: According to OK!, Josh Hartnett is in talks to appear in four to six upcoming episodes of 30 Rock as "a potential love interest for Tina [Fey]'s character." [OK! via Defamer]

Superman Returns 2: Bryan Singer confirmed to Empire today that work is under way on a sequel to 2006's Superman Returns, which was boring. [Empire]

Take a Seat, David, You're Safe: According to DialIdol.com, a site that attempts to predict the results of American Idol by counting the number of busy signals users get when they try to vote for each contestant (or something), Vulture's Idol, David Archuleta, will definitely not be voted off tonight. Phew! [DialIdol.com]

Want To See a Puppy Lip-synching to Death Metal? We thought so. [Break.com]

M.A.C Shadow Gets Knocked Off, CK Shadow Just Wears Off

ck Calvin Klein shadowPhoto: Courtesy of Sephora

HAIR:
• For down-there hair, the question for beauty buffs now is not whether to bare it all, but how. Laser hair removal seems more popular than waxing, but waxing might be better for you if you like to change up your "style." [Girls in the Beauty Department/Glamour]

SKIN:
• The body bath soak from Lindi Skin ($28) helps nourish sensitive skin. Originally designed to prevent interference with cancer treatments, it contains only plant-based ingredients to soothe all over. [Bella Sugar]

‘Lost Boys: The Tribe’ Trailer: Corey Feldman Needs Some New Pants

The Tagline: "The next chapter of the cult phenomenon."

The Translation: Two Coreys, one cheap sequel.

The Verdict: The Tribe is the story of siblings who move to a sleepy little seaside town and battle a teen vampire gang. Sound familiar? That's because Tribe recycles everything about the Lost Boys, right down to the character of Edgar Frog: After 21 years, he still has the same haircut, same bandanna, same camo pants, and the same lame-ass insults ("She's a suck monkey!"). There's really only one reason to see this film: the big-screen reunion of former teen stars Corey Feldman and Corey Haim. Have two other actors ever shared the same name and the same tragic, washed-out fate? We find the description of the vampire lifestyle given by The Tribe's would-be Kiefer Sutherland — "Never grow old.… Never die.… Never know fear again" — to be quite a touching thumbnail of the duo's barrel-scraping acting careers. So, even though Corey Haim is completely absent from this trailer, will we plunk down $11 to see the two Coreys try to suck (and man, will they suck) some life back into their feature-film careers through a cheap sequel? Sigh…you bet we will. —Tammy Oler

Park Slope Child Gets Away With Crime, Rewarded With Appearance on ‘Colbert Report’

Last night The Colbert Report got on the case of Natalie Shea, the 6-year-old Park Slope girl who was fined $300 by the city for defacing the sidewalk in front of her home with colored chalk last fall. "Graffiti is a crime, pure and simple," Councilman Peter Vallone Jr., apparently one of the last people on earth who hasn't heard of Colbert, tells the camera with stern seriousness. "Graffiti artists are punks." We have to say, when the camera cuts to giggling, gloating Natalie and her indulgent, Bobo parents, we don't entirely disagree: These people should be prosecuted! Click above to watch the video.

Earlier: Sidewalk Chalking Is a Gateway Crime

The Magnetic Fields Get in the Habit

Photo: Micky Simawi/Retna

2. Eddie Argos, "I Like Birds"
Art Brut's sarcastic, hilarious front man Eddie Argos can make anything sound like a double entendre, even the nonsensical lyrics to this oddball Eels song. [Pitchfork]

3. Emmy the Great, "Aiko"
This British teenager may not be worthy of her moniker, but it's pretty good, at least, and the last verse is in Japanese, which we suppose is sort of cool. [Anyone's Guess]

4. Odd Nosdam feat. Jessica Bailiff, "Forever Heavy (Shoegangster/JB remix)"
The word "shoegangster" makes us think of Dr. Dre teaming up with Kevin Shields, which seems like a buddy movie waiting to happen. [Pitchfork]

5. Basia Bulat, "True Love Will Find You in the End" (Daniel Johnston cover)
The cover is really lovely, but somehow we still feel better taking dating advice from the overweight, mentally ill Texan than the attractive, blonde Canadian. [Daytrotter]
—Ehren Gresehover

EXCLUSIVE! Silda Wall Spitzer and Hillary Clinton's Phone Conversation

Photo Illustration: Everett Bogue; Photos: Getty Images

[A phone rings somewhere in the Spitzer apartment on the Upper East Side. Silda is holed up in the bedroom, reading a copy of Honor Thyself, Danielle Steel's latest best-seller. She does not get up — the thing has been ringing off the hook, and it's always for him. Usually these insistent calls come late at night, after she's thankfully taken a Klonopin and drifted off to sleep. On the other side of the apartment, Eliot is surrounded by advisers in the children's playroom. He is seated precariously on a Playmobil tea table. He picks up the phone.]

Eliot: If this is anyone but the Daily Princetonian, I have no comment, okay?
Hillary: Hello, Eliot.
Eliot: Kristen? Is it you? I've been trying—
Hillary: NO, it's not KRISTEN. God, they always have white-trash names, don't they?
Eliot: Mom?

Hillary: [Her voice drips like acid on a baby's flesh] It's me. Remember, your friend who you fucked with your idiotic driver's-licenses-for-illegal-immigrants bullshit? Oh, sorry, fucked was the wrong word. You save that for interstate hookers.
Eliot: Oh, hi, Hillary.
Hillary: Can I speak to Silda, please?

[Eliot looks relieved and tells an aide to alert his wife. She's within shouting distance, but since yesterday she's been doing that thing she does where she pretends she can't hear him. Silda picks up the phone in the bedroom.]

Silda: Hello?
Hillary: Silda, it's Hillary.
Silda: Eliot! Get off the phone. I can hear you panting.
Eliot: I just wanted to make sure it connected. Bye!
[Pause]
Silda: I know you're still there, Eliot. Wouldn't you rather go stick your dick in a muffler and drive across state lines? Get off the phone! [Eliot hangs up.]
Hillary: Ah, I remember those days. Cock jokes really help. This kind of thing makes you realize that men are giant phalluses, huh?
Silda: Don't take this the wrong way, Hillary, but when you start calling, it means the shit has really hit the fan.
Hillary: I know. Though I prefer to use the term "the cigar has hit the intern."
Silda: I don't know if I'm ready to laugh about this yet.
Hillary: You're going to have to. These next few weeks are going to be filled with such seriousness that you're going to have to laugh every once in a while. Otherwise you'll want to kill him.
Silda: But I don't want to let him off the hook.
Hillary: You should really deal with this head on and take all the pain you can; otherwise you'll never get over it. But part of you will need to not take this seriously. He's going to do this thing where he's going to be really serious and act like everything he does is so grave and important and sad. It's another way of him relishing the fact that he is the powerful one, even if it means his power has destroyed things. You need to deflate that. Otherwise you'll hate him, and he'll go on thinking he is the center of the world.
Silda: Wow. Is that what you did?
Hillary: No, swatted him in the balls with Lyndon Johnson's nine iron.
Silda: Did that help?
Hillary: It meant he didn't cheat on me for at least a two-week period. Listen, these men are all the same. I think it's too late to change who they are. But it doesn't mean you can't still have a family and you can't still have a great life.
Silda: Do you think they ever learn that their actions have consequences?
Hillary: I don't think Bill ever did. Otherwise he wouldn't have been able to be so confident through that mess. I think you're lucky, in a way. Not because of the embarrassment, but because all this horrible shame has made Eliot a human again.
Silda: But I don't know if I was with him because he was a human. I mean, I married him because of it, but at this point with our kids nearly grown up, our life wasn't really about us. It was about the public.
Hillary: But it wasn't, for him, you know? He was still taking time out for himself in a selfish way — with the other girls and all. Now you need to take as much time for you as you can. Do whatever you want.
Silda: Should I leave him, do you think?
Hillary: That's a decision only you can make. You're the hero of the family now.
Silda: But I just don't know how I feel. It's all too public. I wish someone would just tell me what to do.
Hillary: Well, think about what you want in the long term, after all of this has died down. It really depends on that.
Silda: On what?
Hillary: On whether or not you want to run for office, of course.

Fin.

How We Offended Stylist–cum–Reality Star Rachel Zoe

Hisssssssssss.Photo: Patrick McMullan

Just as our jolly cigarette-scented banter was about to end, a natty British dude said hello and Rachel turned cheery. "He did a piece on me for British Vogue. He was incredibly kind and incredibly honest. That was refreshing." Does that mean that not all journalists are so, er, refreshing? "I'll let you answer that." That reminds us! Had she spoken with new mommy and ex-client Nicole Richie, who supposedly called Zoe "raisin face"? Quick change! "You said you'd be nice," she said. "Goodnight." We'd have gone in for the air kiss, but we hate the smell of cigarettes. — Justin Ravitz

Related: How Marc Jacobs Started (Almost) on Time, and Why Rachel Zoe Was Late

Kimmel, Carolla Want Out of Mangled Manhood Suit

‘Rectal Realism’ Artist Neke Carson on the Long-Lost Portrait of Warhol He Painted With His Butt

Carson and Warhol back in the day.Photo: Anton Percih, courtesy of Neke Carson

"Page Six" readers may have scratched their heads when they read Monday's short item announcing that artist Neke Carson's "Portrait of Andy Warhol" was being shown at the Warhol Museum in Pittsburgh starting this Friday. Sure, it's great that this painting is appearing for the first time in 28 years. But what's the big deal? Carson painted it with a paintbrush sticking out of his butt. That's the big deal. Carson, now 61, is the longtime co-curator of an eclectic, cult-following Tuesday-night performance series at the Gershwin Hotel. He spoke to an utterly fascinated Vulture about his ass-tonishing conceptual art feat.

How did you meet Andy Warhol in the first place?
He came and did his Exploding Plastic Inevitable show at RISD in the late sixties when I was a student. At the after-party, he said, "If you ever get to New York, come by the Factory." That was a Tuesday or Wednesday, and by Friday I was knocking on the Factory door.

What was the Factory like?
Warhol come out and was very nice and then went back to work, and I watched what they all were doing. That night we went to some club, and I realized that I really hadn't planned this whole thing. Typically they didn't let people stay overnight at the Factory, but Billy Name was very nice and let it slide for one night. Once I graduated, I went right back and showed Andy my sculpture of a clear Plexiglas fountain. He said, "Why don't you just leave it here?" Eventually it got reviewed in Time, and that was because of Andy. People don't understand that about him, that he would do things like that.

So moving on to 1972…
I was working on a new form of portraiture, Rectal Realism.

This was the era of body art, and it was sort of a parody of that. I watched a lot of kung fu movies, and in one, the guy gets so angry, he thrusts his hand into a wall and pulls out the sword. I wanted to do something like that with a pen or pencil, and finally my wife at the time said, "Why don't you just stick it up your ass and be done with it?" And I thought, you have a point there. My first idea was an El Marko, but it was way too big and had a big stopper at the end. So I tried it out with a paintbrush and Pentels. I'd dip one end into rubber latex so you could kind of grip them in a way.

Could you see your work as you did it?
I had to do it upside down and backwards, lifting my crotch. When I started Andy's portrait, I made his eyes too far apart and he was very upset. The Factory people were filming it as I did it. [The film will be part of the new exhibition.]

How did you control the strokes?
With my legs. My idea was, your hand is way too sophisticated to make art. This had much less baggage, to get this eye-ass coordination going. You had to rewire your brain, go from your eyes to your butt instead of your arms. I don't know if it helped that I was dyslexic.

Did it feel good or painful?
It was pretty neutral because I went for a thin Pentel. It was like a thermometer. Does a thermometer feel good?

Neke Carson's Portrait of Andy Warhol.Courtesy of the artist

What did he think of the results?
He said, "Oh, it looks great."

Then the painting was briefly stolen in 1979.
It was part of a punk-art show in Washington. Someone came into the gallery and took it home and put it in his room. The police put out a call for it on the radio. Finally this guy turned it in. I took a train down to Washington and painted him a small picture of the portrait and gave it to him. I wasn't angry. He was like a big, giant kid.

Have you done Rectal Realism in recent years?
No. That's a young man's game.
—Tim Murphy

Chanel Iman Knows Victoria's Secret

Someone's got a secret…Photo: Imaxtree

Related: Justin Guinta's Dancing Feet [Fashion Week Daily]

Inside the Sad, Bizarre World That Was the Lauren Conrad Show

We're not sure even Audrina would wear this stuff.Photo: Getty Images

But first, the gossip: We spotted L.C.’s roommate Audrina Patridge wearing a long teal dress and pots of foundation — later, when she almost ran us down in her shiny, white two-door Mercedes Benz, we couldn’t help but notice her car had a Jeannie Bueller air about it that was in sync with Audrina’s weirdly eighties-style eyeliner. Considering she was essentially there to drum up press for MTV, we found it a bit surprising that she actually had to drive herself to the venue. Call your PR person, Audrina. Surely you’ve got one.

Inside, Audrina chatted up new regular Hills cast member Lo Bosworth and ol' standby Whitney Port, who looked very tall and pretty in person. In a refreshing moment of modesty, Whitney rather endearingly chose not to walk through the special red-carpet photo-op area and seemed sort of surprised when the photographers wouldn’t let her escape so easily. The girls were seated cheek by jowl with Lauren’s ex Brody Jenner, who spent the entire show tapping his feet to the music and giving finger guns to someone seated across the runway — possibly Lauren’s other ex and maybe-current boyfriend, Stephen Colletti. And because this was very clearly an MTV joint, which requires maximum drama even at a fashion show, we also spotted L.C.’s former arch-rival and ex-girlfriend of both Brody AND Stephen (you’re following this, right?), Laguna Beach’s Kristin Cavallari. She greeted both dudes enthusiastically, wandering into the venue twenty minutes after everyone else (and twenty minutes after they were seated and the media mob had left the runway) and frantically trying to yank up her low-rise jeans to prevent any unfortunate flashing incidents. We overheard her telling a reporter that she is SO single right now, and has NO — emphasis hers — plans to return to reality television, which may effectively quash those pesky rumors that she’s appearing on The Hills. Sadly, considering the circumstances, there were no screaming confrontations, crying jags, bitch slaps, or passionate kisses.

Also absent from the venue was anyone recognizable from Lauren’s former place of employment (er, “employment”), Teen Vogue, any celebrities willing to admit they totally love The Hills, or any decent fashion. We don’t say that with (much) glee. We went into the show completely prepared to like it, to be embarrassed by liking it, and to spend the rest of the week being defensive about liking it. This did not happen. Lauren claimed the line was inspired by her recent trip to Paris, and given how obviously and ham-handedly this influence was translated into the clothes, we’re frankly surprised she didn’t style the girls with baguettes and giant wheels of Brie. Let’s just say…there were berets involved, and, overall, the collection was sadly kind of tragique. We expected a line of derivative but serviceably-adorable cocktail dresses much like what Lauren herself wears around town — you know, the type of stuff she probably bought a season ago from BCBG and loved. Instead, we got paper-thin leggings with lazy and plain triangle shirts, cheap-looking fabric more befitting a Target line than anything you’d pay boutique prices for, and a terrible color palette that would give Michael Kors an aneurysm.

We understand the desire to strike while the iron of her celebrity is hot, but, overall, the effort felt very young, in the sense that Lauren probably needs a few more years of design school before she’s ready to take on anything this ambitious. Photos do the line more favors than an up-close look — hardly anything was properly fitted, many of the dresses bunched in the back, and one model’s boobs were totally squeezing out of the top of her dress. Our greatest moment of joy was seeing Chantal, the runner-up from last cycle of America’s Next Top Model, strutting down the runway — but even that was tinged with sadness, because, seriously, the girl still cannot walk and may even have regressed since she was last under the tutelage of Miss J.

L.C.’s friends tried their best, but mostly they wore very careful non-expressions on their faces. Whitney, in particular, seemed to be holding onto her poker face like grim death, probably because she realized how savaged her friend would be if any actual fashion press had attended. When an obviously relieved Conrad finally came out for her bow, only Cavallari stood for her initially, but the others got up once they realized what was happening and the room was full of extremely polite smiles. So despite all that dramatic potential, in the end, we found ourselves aching for Spencer and Heidi to storm the fortress and cause some real shenanigans. After all, as much as we don’t look to the MTV crowd for edgy fashion inspiration, we really don’t turn to it for lessons in manners. —The Fug Girls

Update: Kevin Federline NOT Coming to Broadway, Sadly

Photo: Getty Images

Look Out Broadway! Here Comes … K-Fed? [Extra]
Earlier: At Last, Kevin Federline Is Coming to Broadway!

Among Other Things, Eliot Spitzer Has Contributed to Hooker Inflation

Whoring isn't what it used to be. Photo Illustration: Everett Bogue; Photos: Getty Images, WireImage

How the New Rich Are Changing the Oldest Profession [WSJ]

Earlier: You Can Say This About the Girls of the Emperor's Club: They're No Morons

*We made this bit up. Our real Grampy, God rest his soul, was a wonderful man and a devout Catholic who never ran with loose women. With the exception of his second wife. But they were married.

Double Take: Models and Designers Merge

We didn’t have to wait until the show’s end to catch a glimpse of the designers this season. From Nina Ricci to DVF, models were styled eerily similar to the designers. Runway after runway, we were all seeing double.

Jill Bauwens, Olivier Theyskens at Nina Ricci.Photo: Imaxtree

At Nina Ricci, Olivier Theyskens dressed model Bauwens as his twin, down to the orange pants, flowing dark hair, and luminescent pale skin.

Agnete Hegelund, Cristina Ortiz at Salvatore Ferragamo.Photo: Imaxtree

Flavia De Oliveira, Diane Von FurstenbergPhoto: Imaxtree

Kasia Struss, Dan and Dean Caten at DSquared2Photo: Imaxtree (Struss), Getty Images (Caten)

Ritter's MDs Lacked Common Sense: Lawyer

Life vs. Art: Eliot Spitzer and ‘Pretty Woman’

Photo: Courtesy of Touchstone Pictures; Getty Images

A close look at the transcript of the now-famous affidavit in the Spitzer scandal reveals the similarities between Spitzer’s whore-of-the-moment, Kristen, and Vivian, Julia Roberts’s character in Pretty Woman. At least we hope so! Client 9 is described as a “difficult” man who sometimes asked the prostitutes “to do things you might not think were safe.” What could that mean? Well, in Pretty Woman, Vivian, memorably, is "a safety girl," offering Richard Gere a "buffet" of condoms — just like Kristen, it seems, who has "a way of dealing with that.” (We're assuming here that Client 9's "difficult" requests were not some horrifying sexual fetish but something rather vanilla.)

And that's not all! "I'm here for a purpose," Kristen says in the affidavit. "I know what my purpose is. I am not a … moron, you know what I mean." And Julia Roberts, as Vivian, knows what her purpose is too! "When I'm with a guy," she says, "I'm a robot, I just do it."

The affidavit ends with Kristen’s booker, Ms. Lewis, remarking on her seemingly novel wisdom. Said Ms. Lewis, “You look at it very uniquely, because … no one ever says it that way.” Aha! But we all know that Julia Roberts said it very nearly that way almost twenty years ago.

So we’re left wondering, Is this all just a coincidence? Safe sex and knowing not to fall in love with a client seem like pretty standard hooker guidelines. We’re hoping, though, that this is case of life imitating art — we’re picturing a young Kristen watching Pretty Woman over and over on VHS (as we did), and subconsciously absorbing how a hooker should act … and then acting accordingly. Too bad the Luv Guv is no Richard Gere. —Emma Rosenblum

Bushwick Life: Rat Poop on Your Pillow, Organic Milk in Your Bodega

Bushwick: The area is not so gentrified that you may not still experience the thrill of rats going through your trash or taking a dump on your bed. But at least you can get organic milk in the bodegas now. [BushwichBK]
Clinton Hill: It looks like the stakeout for Spitzer's hooker bookers has moved here, with TV crews sniffing around for Tameka Lewis, a.k.a. "Rachelle." [Nervous Acid]
Fort Greene: Perhaps remorseful that he demolished the area's only supermarket to make room for a massive 600-unit condo project, John Catsimatidis promised it'd have a grocery. But nearby project dwellers worry they won't be able to afford it if it's one of his Gristedes. [NYDN]

Harlem: Vornado's stacked-glass-boxes behemoth Harlem Park complex will bust the height limit on 125th Street, and in return the megadeveloper will put more than $1 million into maintaining area parks and $300K into a community-hiring program. [NYO]
Midtown: The community board for the MoMA's district objects to a funky Jean Nouvel tower going up near the museum because "the scale is totally inappropriate in a low-rise area." Low-rise? We quote Curbed: "Um, hello, it's Midtown!" [Curbed]
Soho: Never mind that some filmmakers were busted here for scaring the shit out of neighbors with a fake-gun scene. The real scoop is that Soho's a "swank Manhattan neighborhood … renowned for chic boutiques and celebrity sightings." Get out, you don't say! [NYDN]

Artist John Powers Builds a Better Death Star

John Powers's Empire (2008).Image courtesy of Tom Powel Imaging.

John Powers's handmade aluminum-plated Styrofoam sculptures are so detailed and mathematically precise, you'll think they crawled out of your PS3. Empire is a shattered, five-foot-diameter mirrored sphere, equal parts Tony Smith, Saturday Night Fever, and the Death Star. His show, also called "Empire," is at Virgil de Voldere in Chelsea. —William Bostwick

The Lonely Kink

Ray Davies, one of rock's most influential songwriters, is making his way as a solo artist. But all he really wants is his band back. Click here for the essential album-by-album guide to the Kinks' discography Outside the restaurant, wind and rain pelt a village green in the Highgate neighborhood of London. Inside the restaurant, Ray Davies contemplates his career since the Kinks dissolved in 1996. "I've realized how difficult it is to be on your own after being in a group for so long," says Davies, who led the Kinks for thirty-two years. "I want to feel I'm in a band, but I'm not. That's the biggest problem...

Louis Vuitton Going to Brooklyn: Hoax?

Brooklyn-bound?Photo: Courtesy of Louis Vuitton

Vuitton is opening a store offering a mix of multicolor monogram handbags and small leather goods, as well as actual limited edition art canvasses with a new design by Murakami and Marc Jacobs called "Monogramouflage." They will preview a new Vuitton collection, which will launch in the Brooklyn store on June 1, and be sold at select Vuitton stores worldwide starting June 15.

So Vuitton's got a full-blown outer-borough store in the works? Or at least a pop-up shop? With new Murakami-designed bags? And they'll even debut a collection for worldwide sale in our fair Brooklyn?!

It might sound too good to be true for a reason. A spokeswoman from the Brooklyn Museum said she didn't know where WWD got this information but could not confirm the museum would sell any Louis Vuitton bags. Our dreams are dashed! We are awaiting comment from Louis Vuitton and will keep you posted of any developments.

Update: Fashion Week Daily reports Louis Vuitton will open a pop-up shop in the Brooklyn Museum on June 1. The Brooklyn Museum and Louis Vuitton have yet to confirm details with the Cut, or, um each other.

Fashion Scoops: Richard Who? [WWD]

3-D Theater Deal Offers Hollywood More Incentive to Make Crappy Movies

Photo: Hulton Archive/Getty Images

Sure, this sounds perhaps overly technophobic, and we're never ones to deny the pleasures of a big, fat cinema spectacle. But, as many have pointed out, there's little difference between the current vogue for 3-D among studios and theater owners and the various audience-baiting technological advancements introduced into theaters in the fifties, as movies were panicking about competition from newly emergent television.

Does this mean that the movies Hollywood makes over the next few years will be empty spectacles on par with early 3-D and Cinemascope features? Maybe not — maybe they'll just be the same movies they were going to make anyway, only they'll cost $15 million more to make than expected, thanks to 3-D expenses. But, on the other hand, maybe so. After all, the shining star of the new 3-D revolution is not an action movie or a fantasy film or even, you know, porn; it's Hannah Montana & Miley Cyrus: Best of Both Worlds Concert. Are you ready to pay $17 to see more of that?

Studios Announce a Deal to Help Cinemas Go 3-D [NYT]

Francis Free, Blasts "Inbred" Florida Officials

The Long Hand of the Trumps Slaps Madame Tussauds Right in Her Wax Face

What's wrong with a little nail polish every once in a
while? A wax lady likes nice things!Photo: Patrick McMullan

Madame Tussauds New York would like to set the record straight. On Friday, the Daily News called and was inadvertently given incorrect information by a Tussauds employee. Unfortunately, the employee thought the Daily News was asking about a different figure. Madame Tussauds New York does not in fact have a figure of Ivanka Trump... yet. We apologize for the confusion. Madame Tussauds loves the Trumps and is very proud of its figures of Donald and Ivana Trump, as well as its more than 200 lifelike figures.

OH MY GOD — are they saying Ivana Trump is sending nail polish for her wax likeness at the museum? That's even better!

We asked the rep for the museum if that was the case. "When Madame Tussauds creates figures, they work with the personalities involved to ensure that the figure represents them accurately," she explained. "When Madame Tussauds New York created Ivana Trump's figure, Ivana provided a supply of nail polish from her own line to match her dress, which she had also donated to Tussauds." Ah, that explains the confusion. But is there really regular touching-up going on? "Before the doors open every day, Madame Tussauds' own studio artists touch up all of the figures," we learned. "For example, if nail polish is chipped, they repaint it; if a hair is out of place, they restyle it; and so on. Figures are also from time to time taken off of the floor to get a shampoo up in the Madame Tussauds studios." They SHAMPOO them? Okay, we are officially no longer skeptical about the kinds of people who work at wax museums. They are geniuses.

Polishing Ivanka's Image [NYDN]

The entrance Sony Ericsson's factory in Ribeauville, eastern France

Fashion Week Moving to Tenth Avenue Rail Yards?

Go West, young fashionistas!Photo: Getty Images

An insider says the recognition is in part for Hizzoner's long-range pledge to [CFDA president Diane] Von Furstenberg that whoever wins the bid to develop the rail yards will have to ensure that the complex can host Fashion Week.

"He was also instrumental in keeping Fashion Week at Bryant Park until 2010, when it looked like they were going to get kicked out sooner," says the source. "Fashion is the No. 2 industry in New York, after finance."

Since we spend our days luxuriating in New York's glamorous offices on Varick Street, it doesn't make that much difference to us — a cab ride's a cab ride. And having to avoid midtown kinda rocks. But we have a feeling the ladies of a certain building (cough, cough, 4 Times Square) may not be so pleased. Having the shows moved from down the street to the other end of the world (may as well be) is going to make someone frown. On the bright side, the tents will be closer to the designers that end up in West Chelsea. Think of how many fewer taxi fights there'll be! And with the shows starting on time these days, the girls and gays could really get vicious.

Fashion's on track for really long trains [NYDN]
Related: Marc Jacobs, Tom Ford, and Tory Burch Nab CFDA Noms

Salvador Dali in 1971

Andrew W.K.'s ‘McLaughlin Group’ Song Finally Gets an Animated Video

Scott Bateman: Andrew W.K. sings about "The McLaughlin Group" [Salon]

Earlier: Andrew W.K. and John McLaughlin Are the Burt Bacharach and Hal David of ‘McLaughlin Group’–Inspired Party Anthems

Britney Drawn to Perfection

Between the Sheets

From left, V magazine, W magazine, Lula.

Schnabel Schleps Uptown, Hires Fancy Broker for Chupi

Schmile!Photo: realestate.nytimes.com; Intel editors: Patrick McMullan

Schnabel’s Palazzo Goes Mainstream With $59 M. in Broker Listings [NYO]

Mariah Takes Janet's Saturday Shift

Expert Analysis on Dolce & Gabbana's Legal Woes

Stefano Gabbana, left, with Domenico Dolce — and some of the money they owe the government.Photo Illustration: Getty Images, iStockphoto

In dire need of answers, we contacted New York University law professor Franco Ferrari, an Italian-law expert.

Ferrari explained that both houses screwed up in that they set up companies in foreign countries (Dolce & Gabbana in Luxembourg and Ferragamo in Holland) where taxes are lower than those in Italy. However, they didn't really operate from those countries — they were still running their shows from Italy. "Even the order to buy the toners for printers came from Italy," Ferrari said. "The revenues have to be taxed in Italy rather than the country where the company is said to be operating."

So why'd the fashion houses make such a poor move? Ferrari thinks it was the result of bad advice. "I believe what they tried to do is perfectly legal. The problem is they have not met all the requirements for it to really work," he said. "They have some counselor or CPA who probably has done some wrong stuff. Someone should have consulted with them earlier."

Ferrari speculated Domenico Dolce and Stefano Gabbana would stay out of jail if the company paid its fines on time. Though it's not under criminal investigation (perhaps because they owe less), Ferragamo should be in the clear after it pays up. Dolce & Gabbana has already paid the Italian government half of its 90 million euro penalty (about $140 million), and Ferragamo must cough up more than 20 million euros (about $30 million).

Most important, Dolce & Gabbana customers won't likely feel the burn from any of this. "They have to pay within a certain period of time, and I’m sure that will have an implication on their market value," Ferrari said. But, he added, "customers will not stop eyeing products in Dolce & Gabbana because the IRS in Italy found out they are doing this with the companies abroad." Indeed.

Related: Dolce & Gabbana Under Criminal Investigation

Stephen Colbert Will Play a Thicker-Necked President Than You Might Expect

Photo: Getty Images

"Oh really, maybe it came out when you were in jail." —Ben Stiller responds to Robert Downey Jr.'s lack of familiarity with Mystery Men [EW]

"It's funny because I tell you the title, but then because of my accent it's all over the Net with the wrong title! It's called 'The Return of the Ice Kids.' But if you say 'Ice Kings,' that's cool too, I guess." —Michel Gondry corrects MTV for posting the wrong title for his new film [MTV]

"From frame one, it will be unrelenting terror! All those teenage girls who found the movie and mooned over James Marsden or Brandon? Well, I'm going to wake them up!" —Bryan Singer describes his plan of action for a Superman sequel [Empire]

"YouTube is open to everyone around the world, and if someone wants to click on my video because they want to tap my ass, okay, cool." —Marié Digby on being an online cover artist [BlackBook]

Will ‘Kristen’ Get a High Rate From the Media, Too?

MEDIA
• How did the New York Times get the Spitzer scoop anyway? [NYO]
• "CNN Admits: We Shouldn't Have Used Alleged Stripper Biter As Spitzer Commentator." [AP via HuffPo]
• Bids for an interviews with "Kristen," the prostitute who slept with "Client 9," are reportedly up to $100,000. [Guest of a Guest]

FINANCE
•In a move that sent stock prices soaring, the Federal Reserve offered to let Wall Street banks borrow up to $200 billion. Although some worry that this capital infusion might just be a Band-Aid. "They are essentially creating a $300 billion bank out of nothing," one analyst said. [NYT]
• Why is Henry Kravis's KKR holding off on its IPO? [DealBook/NYT]
• Goldman head honcho Lloyd Blankfein, whose car budget was $233,000 last year, needs transportation for "security reasons." [Footnoted]

LAW
• Watch what you put on YouTube! Like the man who was tasered by a highway cop, your videos could land you in court. [Lede/NYT]
• Former New York Stock Exchange chairman Dick Grasso can't get rid of the judge in the lawsuit that challenges his $190 million compensation package. [NYP]
• In day two of the Barry Diller–John Malone negotiations, Malone flunky Gregory Maffei told a Delaware court that it was he who pushed for the suit against Malone's longtime partner. "John Malone considered Barry Diller a friend," he said. "Because of the friendship, I don't think (he) was willing to tackle some of the issues. I have been in effect the point person. I don't believe it's a personal matter." Does this make Diller feel better? Unclear. [Portfolio]

Judge: Fairplay Must Provide Details About Bonaduce Dust-Up

Stars' Diet Pledges: Do People Care?

Insurance Company's Suit Against Robert De Niro Dismissed

Hello Goodbye for Some 'Idol' Hopefuls?

A-List Cooks Give 'Top Chef' 4 Stars

Eliot Spitzer Resigns

Yes, Eliot, this has left a sour taste in our mouths, too.Photo: Getty Images

In the past few days I have begun to atone for my private failures with my wife Silda my children, and my entire family. The remorse I feel will always be with me. Words cannot describe how grateful I am for the love and compassion they have shown me. From those to whom much is given, much is expected. I have been given much, the love of my family, the faith and trust of the people of New York, and the chance to lead this state. I am deeply sorry that I did not live up to what was expected of me. To every New Yorker and to all those who believed in what I have tried to stand for, I sincerely apologize. I look at my time as governor with a sense of what might have been, but I also know that as a public servant that I and the people I work with have accomplished a great deal.

There is much more to be done, and I can't allow my private failings to disrupt this work. Over the course of my public life I have insisted, I believe correctly, that people, regardless of their position or power, take responsibility for their conduct. I can, and will, ask no less of myself. For this reason, I am resigning from the office of governor. At Lieutenant Governor Paterson's request, the resignation will go into effect Monday, March 17, a date that he believes will permit an orderly transition.

I go forward with the belief, as others have said, that as human beings, our greatest glory lies not in never falling, but in rising every time we fall. As I leave public life, I will first do what I need to do to help and heal myself and my family. Then I will try once again, outside of politics, to serve the common good, and move toward the ideals and solutions which I believe can build a future of hope for us and our children. I hope all of New York will join my prayers for my friend David Paterson as he embarks on his new mission, and I thank the public once again for the privilege of public service.

His resignation came just before a deadline that state Republicans had set for beginning impeachment procedures. But reports say that more likely the reasoning for the timing lay in Spitzer's efforts to make a deal with federal officials who may raise criminal charges against him. Lieutenant Governor David Paterson will be sworn into his new role later in Albany. The former state senator (representing Harlem) will be New York's first black governor, and only the fourth black to run a state in American history.

Click here to read Daily Intel's complete coverage of the Eliot Spitzer scandal.

Source: Daily Intelligencer - New York Magazine | 12 Mar 2008 | 4:50 pm

Spitzer becomes the butt of late night jokes

Read full story for latest details.

Source: CNN.com - Entertainment | 12 Mar 2008 | 3:50 pm

John Cho bracing for Trekkie fame

Read full story for latest details.

Source: CNN.com - Entertainment | 12 Mar 2008 | 3:03 pm

Sonya Hartnett was first published when she was just 15 years old

This handout picture from the Astrid Lindgren Memorial Award fund shows the 2008 winner of the award, Australian author Sonya Hartnett. The award is named after the Swedish creator of Pippi Longstocking...
Source: Infocious RSS raw feed - channel BNImagesEnter | 12 Mar 2008 | 2:55 pm

Cartoon Britney Is Animated in New Video

Screen shots from the video for the pop star's upcoming single "Break the Ice" show an animated Spears as a futuristic, bodysuit-clad superhero as well as a building named "Victory."
Source: FOXNews.com | 12 Mar 2008 | 2:50 pm

Man Charged With Mailing Bomb Threat Mentioning Jodie Foster

Authorities arrested a Massachusetts man Tuesday and charged him with mailing a bomb threat mentioning actress Jodie Foster to a Los Angeles-area airport.
Source: FOXNews.com | 12 Mar 2008 | 1:30 pm

Pop Tarts: Daughter The Victim in Hogans Alleged Adultery

Reality TV starlet Brooke Hogan is suffering amid recent allegations that her famous father Hulk Hogan had an affair with her best friend triggering the breakdown of his marriage to wife Linda.
Source: FOXNews.com | 12 Mar 2008 | 1:16 pm

Kid Rock Causes Scene at Waffle House

He signed autographs for charity instead of racking up charges of battery.
Source: ABC News: Entertainment | 12 Mar 2008 | 1:10 pm

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